I think that if we could avoid triggers then we would. The fact that we don't just means we have more work to do. My personal concern is that I may not survive to do the learning and that's a sobering conclusion. Your mileage may vary!

I'm hoping that I've got a long way to go tommymott. The things I should avoid and should and shouldn't do sometimes are so strange or things people do so commonly that it's hard to avoid them, if that makes sense.

No. When you accept, realize and learn to manage your BiPolar Life. You learn that Triggers are not good things, no matter how good they might feel at the time. So you avoid them like the plague. If you want to successfully manage the BiPolar and get to a point where your Stable and can't have a good quality of life, then you ignore or fight the triggers, because choosing to purposefully do them, will do nothing but make you worse, and going in the negative direction is never the right thing to do.

OlderCPer I actually am pretty stable now despite lots of stress. It doesn't mean that I didn't make a mistake and I feel pretty bad about it. Yes, I will avoid it again, but I honestly didn't remember how triggered I could get by Twitter of all things. I never said it was purposeful either. It wasn't like I was out there like hey can I find something to trigger me. I was asking if other people make mistakes and if they do how do they avoid doing it again. It's good to know though that there are people out there who can just avoid everything that triggers them. I do my best but I sure as hell am not perfect. If you have any advice as to how you avoid all things that trigger you, I would love to hear it.

Is it the end of the world if we give in now and then?

I don't think anybody can be in control all the time. Nobody is perfect. I had a terrible day at work yesterday and felt like eating Doritos so I did. I ate about one million Doritos. They were delicious and I ate much healthier today. Not necessarily a trigger but sometimes I think managing a life with bipolar disorder means not beating ourselves up so much and realizing that tomorrow is a new day and what a difference a day can make.

man if you figure that out, your *old name, manic depressive* would be changed to psyMD and all the pharmaceutical companies would go bankrupt! Me, I'm on a rollercoaster despite the years with bp, yes I do have tools, but sometimes, like you, some silly thing like a song on the radio can trigger me into the mind chatter, staying inside I know is not good for me, but sometimes I just want to be alone with no stimulation. It's a catch 22, damned if you do and damned if you don't...baby steps and trying to learn and catch myself before the hammer gets pulled back. Despite how much ds is supportive, I left for about3 months, returning, I really stayed in my journal area and avoided the feed. I have taken myself out of groups purposely because I get triggered, some other person might not have a problem..self awareness is my only answer...best to you! ml

If it's something that you did and wish you didn't sweetie.... I would just forgive yourself and move on to tomorrow.... We all make choices we wish we didn't sometimes ( if this is what it is)... as May said sometimes we can just give in.... Big squishy hug....xo

Ritkat, I've explained this about a million times, but I'll do it again. I don't sugarcoat things, I just say it as it is. You don't need to get upset or defensive by my answer, it came with no emotion and it didn't say you did anything wrong. You asked a question and I answered. I do stay away from my triggers. I've been BiPolar for 28 years, I've been a cutter for 35 years, I know what tends to trigger me.

I keep a very strict, very organized schedule, if I go off it tends to aggravate the BP.
In my office my employees no that changes are not allowed unless I approve them.
I'm very strict regarding how I handle my money and have things in place so that I'm only allowed access to small amounts at a time, otherwise I blow it.
My oldest son lives with me right now as he's transitioning out of the army, when he gets angry he yells and he sounds just like my ex-husband, that is a major trigger, so I told him he can either get out or go find someone else to yell at.

Out of control physical pain (I have 11 major diseases and 24/7 Chronic Pain) causes me to cut.
If my father who molested me for 4 years when I was a child, posts me on FB or tries to call me, it triggers me to cut.

I'm assuming you've gotten the picture. Yes I know what most of my triggers are and I avoid them like the plague, because I like living a Stable life. I like my Career. I like living alone in my own home and not having people here bugging me all the time. I've had the same Pdoc for 8 yrs now and he's very helpful in keeping me Stable.

Not everyone can do this, i.e. for a rapid cycler its almost impossible. But for a BiPolar who transitions on lesser basis throughout they year, if you keep a diary of what was going on at the time, work, life, family, meds, food, etc. it can be possible to figure out your triggers through the process of elimination.

Oh yeah my fuc*** up, white trash no good family in Texas is a major trigger, so I moved 1300 miles away and haven't talked to any of them in 15 years. I'd rather be stable than be able to say those freaks are my family and I've never wanted my sons to have anything to do with them.

Take care and I hope things level out for you.
Kat

I am a rapid cycler so yes I get triggered by many things - it can be as simple as a trip to the post office or my son just asked me to drive him two hours to get a bus because the national buses are on strike which means a four hour round trip. my anxiety levels are off the charts and i very much want to cut but am doing my best not to and probably wont. i too have cut contact with most of my family because they are not good for my mental health and can and have driven me to suicide failures. as said if you are triggered unexpectedly the best thing is to stop beating yourself up about it. we are not perfect and although we strive for stability it is not always a constant (it would be so much easier if it were but there is no 'cure all'). be gentle with yourself and take a step back - maybe find something you enjoy doing today as a recovery tool. come and vent here, take a bath, go for a walk and just enjoy the spring. the less pressure you have yourself under, the easier it will be. big hugs to you and good thoughts for a better day.

Kat I read every person who has bipolar disorder and doesn't avoid a trigger is unstable and wrong. This morning reading it when I am not in the same place I read it differently and apologize.

I am sorry all of those things have happened to you. I grew up in an emotionally abusive household though my dad also physically abused my mom. Things haven't been a picnic as an adult either. I was sexually assaulted, found out that my husband has a sex/porn compulsion a few months after I got married, had 2 miscarriages, and had a unexplained infertility diagnosis. That was the hardest time bipolar wise because there were hormones involved as well as the whole you may never have biological children. I didn't think anyone would adopt to a woman with bipolar disorder.

I know 2 of my triggers - sleep and stress. Sleep I cannot always control, but once I notice a slide, I get on track to fix it. Stress avoidance has been hard lately between the pup, the boys, trying to get work, our vows renewal, and the anniversary trip that I have been planning for my husband. My kiddos have their physicals Thursday and I have some issues to discuss about my 2 year old bowlegged ball of anger. The kid melts down and I don't know why half the time. He can identify letters, count to 4, say his ABC, and speaks in sentences. He's too smart for his own good, but he is so angry all the time. My oldest is good with numbers and can identify the letter words start with from the sound, but has an expressive speech disorder that has to do with articulation. He is getting more and more frustrated when he isn't understood.

Absolutly, most of us do, but in time you can learn to forgive yourself, even when you do something you could not be forgiven for by others. The trick is to learn from your mistake, don't make it bigger, don't tell on yourself and spread the pain. Learn from it, and do not repeat the mistake, if you find yourself in the same situation, you should be able to pull from the crappy feeling you have now and not repeat it. Go Forward, don't look back.

So I saw a psychic who said I should reconnect with the ex who broke my heart three years ago. I was weary because contact with him always led to more heartache and feelings of failure. So I got in touch with him and he has clearly moved on. I was a sucker. But I know what you mean. I guess you just have to trust your gut. If it feels not right don't do it

It helps me to journal daily. I journal on here, but I also write in a journal. It helps me identify my triggers and moods. Maybe that could help you ritkat..

Reading your post Ritkat, thinking so badly of the way you feel....Your Feelings Are Real to you. That is the problem sometimes with cyber writing, is that the 'human visual' is not attached to the words, thus misunderstandings. Journaling does help, and I will hope you will Allow Yourself to Have This Time: Give This To Yourself as if another tool in the tool box for your balance.

Last week you went on a Date with your hubby, was that fun? How did you feel? Being at home with two little off the wall babies is enough to make a sane person crazy who has no break...constant stress, A Trigger for you as for me as a single parent with an autistic son...it's freek'n hard to make it through each day! never mind managing bp on top of everything else, and life responsibilities!

I had a book called the The Explosive Child. This https://www.amazon.com/Explosive-Child-Understanding-Frustrated-Chronically/dp/0062270451
I carried this book around like a set of Rosary Beads....hope it helps to tame your Angels with Horns! Take care, ml Oh another book was "The Out Of Sync Child" another really good one!