Bipolar Disorder Support Group

Bipolar disorder is not just a single disorder, but a category of mood disorders marked by periods of abnormally high energy and euphoria, often accompanied by bouts of clinical depression. This is the place to talk about your experience with bipolar disorder, learn from others' experiences, and find support.

8,884 Members

129,557 Posts

2 Online

HannaHana 07/30/2009

To the beat of "parents just don't understand" by the Fresh Prince. haha.

My fiance, as saner as you get, thinks that once we move into our new house this weekend that I'll be "happy". As if this 'new beginning' will force happiness upon me and the depression will completely subside.

He's seen me going through BP for years, he's read books and articles about it. He's seen what it's done to me, how it affects me. Yet he still thinks that this big change will only have a positive affect on me.

I know there's no way to understand BP unless you're living with it, but jeez man...you'd think he'd be a little less ignorant by now.

deleted_user 07/30/2009

saners .... pffffft

Shelly4 07/30/2009

People can only know what they experience.....His beliefs are "hopes" that "this will make it better". We all have hope in something and to understand "him" is to know how he loves you and wants you to be better.

It is like us telling our kids something believing that it will make them understand what they have not yet experienced. It rarely works until they do, then the light goes on.

Believe that this change in environement might help Hanna, and it wont cure you but it could change your perspective a little. It did mine when we moved and it was good for me. Blessings. xo

deleted_user 07/30/2009

I think he should be applauded fr continuing to w a n t to understand.

HannaHana 07/30/2009

Sure, it could be a happy thing that I'm moving. I AM looking foward to getting it over with and having a nice new house.

I'm just concerned about my fiance's reaction to the fact that I won't be completely better and I still will have my mood swings. When he asked if I would be "happy" when we moved...not just happy that we moved, actually "happy" and I said "we'll see", he yelled "What the fuck are we doing????"

Am I supposed to see the future now?

deleted_user 07/30/2009

I was going to say the same thing as fishies... LMAO....

deleted_user 07/30/2009

Hanna, Ive been married for along time and my husband still doesnt get it. I dont expect him to. He just thinks Im ecsentric. LOL! I love him to pieces, but he is incapable of understanding. He is very logical and cant understand my erratic behavior. The important thing is he accepts me for who I am and I accept him for who he is. It works for us. Tell him that changing places will not bring on happiness. Its an internal battle. No outside influence can change that. I wish you luck. :)

deleted_user 07/30/2009

I have a hubby that doesn't understand completely, either. And now I'm going to AA and he's still the drunk. He really doesn't get why I HAVE to quit drinking. Instead of encouraging my new behaviors, he tries to enable me! WTF?

HannaHana 07/30/2009

I applaud him for putting up with my shit for so many years.

I know he doesn't understand, but he shouldn't be getting mad at me b/c I don't know how I'll be feeling.

deleted_user 07/30/2009

You should just tell him directly and see what he reacts like.
If someone continues to make the wrong ' predictions' then it's ok to just tell them to stop being such a fuckwit...albeit a loveable fuckwit.

deleted_user 07/30/2009

Oh, my ex husband and I are seeing each other again (why? - ok, I need a second income to move out of my parents house). But he says he won't live with me again until my Bipolar is gone. DUDE!!! That doesn't happen. Need to look for another man!!! And I work with all saners - drives me INSANE - they say "It's all in your head". Well, no shit!!

HannaHana 07/30/2009

As much as I'd LOVE to tell him he's a fuckwit, he doesn't take well to any criticism.

He may WANT to understand, but he doesn't and he won't accept that he just doesn't and can't.

It's come down to me just telling him I'm having BP problems and leave it at that b/c explaining any further is just too frustrating.

deleted_user 07/30/2009

I hear what you're going thru. Maybe counselling would be good for both of you so that he could get a therapist's perspective as well as yours. He needs to know that this is real, that there is no cure, but that there is no reason you can't have a quality of life with him.

ZanyBeeper 07/30/2009

Denise-that is hilarious. He won't move back in with you until you no longer have bipolar??? LMAO.

deleted_user 07/30/2009

' Doesn't take well to any criticism '

HannaHana 07/30/2009

couples counseling is probably in the cards for us. But he just seems so dense when it comes to this.

F'ng saners...yeah, I'll take you back when your BP is gone. DUH.

My fiance blames my pdoc and tdoc if I have a bad day.

Join the Conversation