My uncle finally got his wish and got a donor. She went into surgery Wednesday morning and came out 4hrs later with kidney in tow. My uncle went in at 1:15pn and didn't come out until 11pm at which point they started running tests like ekg, angio, ultrasound.....and they immediately detected that during the surgery, he developed compartment syndrome in his leg which in turn prevented blood flow to his femoral artery and nephrotic veins. They sliced open his calf to relieve pressure and allow for venous return AND TO save his leg. The clot, however, was so large that it prevented blood flow to the new kidney and the new kudney essentially died from lack of oxygen. That was surgery from 11:30pm to 3am Thursday morning. Thursday night, they started him on dialysis through a portal in his neck. It will be a 24-hr dialysis to remove dangerous fluid build up (which is happening now). For goodness sake, he has remained under sedation this entire time. But he's showing good signs of breathing on his own even with the tube. They will not extubate him until his vitals are stable which they almost are. He is still sedated and does not know what's going on. He has no idea that he doesn't yet have a new kidney- his donor is doing well and will probably leave the hospital tomorrow or today. My uncle will be in the ICU for another week or so. They're really just playing it one moment at a time.

They say that my uncle is still a candidate for transplant so that's good - but what will he feel when he wakes up? How will he feel about his donor (his sister-in-law? 

I feel so helpless, I'm drained from being at the hospital. I go back in a few hours, and will be there much of the day. I'm so tired - I'm running on water and junk food from the vending machines. I'm lost. My mood is tanking fast and there's not much I can do to reverse it. How awful. 

I just called the SICU (Surgical ICU) and he had a good night but is still sedated and on dialysis.

Please - send good thoughts and positive energy his way! Boy, is it needed now more than ever. 

Please keep me from losing it.