Bipolar Disorder Support Group

Bipolar disorder is not just a single disorder, but a category of mood disorders marked by periods of abnormally high energy and euphoria, often accompanied by bouts of clinical depression. This is the place to talk about your experience with bipolar disorder, learn from others' experiences, and find support.

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Chuggernaught 01/19/2008

I'm tired. Tired of hurting people with my words. Tired of pushing them away with them. I'm tired of my heart caring about so many people, only to be hurt by them. I'm tired of everyone moving on and me being stuck in a hole. I'm tired of every time I think I've moved on on something, it hits me harder when I least expect it. I tired of people not getting along because they disagree what going to happen after they live instead of just accepting each others differences while we are here. I'm of my heart pounding like this. I swear I don't know how much more tired I can be. To sleep away all this tiredness, I may need to sleep forever. Just venting my frustration, but this pretty close to a suicide note huh?

deleted_user 01/19/2008

The best coping skill I've learned is remaining silent when I'm exploding on the inside. It took a long time to learn but it helps me immensely to have a more normal life.

deleted_user 01/19/2008

That being said, when no one is around me at work, it sounds like I have Tourettes Syndrome.

Chuggernaught 01/19/2008

I know, but in trying I seem to have made it worse...

deleted_user 01/19/2008

Chug are you ok? Maybe you should call a hot line or check yourself in a hospital. Talk to us.

deleted_user 01/19/2008

don't do it chuggs, we are here for you, even if i am new i care. i totally understand where you are coming from been there, are there, you have to dig down deep, find your happy place. i don't mean to sound cliche, but stay here.

deleted_user 01/19/2008

chug, i care too, what can we do to help?

Chuggernaught 01/19/2008

change how people see certain people see me and how they think.

deleted_user 01/19/2008

Although I feel strongly that you should always give tomorrow a chance....I can't help but agree.To want to be the peacemaker and at the same time nuke everything.To sleep forever dreamless.

Just carry on going..whatever your muscles and mind say.
Peace x

deleted_user 01/19/2008

I know what you mean by hurting people with words, I did the same thing last night to someone I adore and nearly lost them. I don't know you Chug but I hope you stay here and talk to your friends who care about you.

deleted_user 01/19/2008

is there someone you could call and ask their permission to yell at them for an hour or two, as long as they remember that it isn't them that you're yelling at, it's the illness? my sister lets me do that and it helps sometimes.

Chuggernaught 01/19/2008

before anyone in here gets too freaked out, understand that as much pain as I'm in, I don't see myself checking out. I will grit my teeth as always. So you guys can go do whatever it was you were doing and not worry about me.

deleted_user 01/19/2008

just make sure you ask BEFORE you start yelling, to avoid confusion lol

deleted_user 01/19/2008

btw if it's any consolation i'm in the same boat lately :S

deleted_user 01/19/2008

I don't believe you want to die. you want these painful feelings to die.
What have you in life that brings you contentment?
If nothing, is there anything you could do, one thing, to bring a quality meaningful ongoing experience in for your well being and purpose in life?

deleted_user 01/19/2008

im sorry chug, i cant do that... i wish i could, i wish i could make all the ugliness in the world disappear, all the lies and distortions and meanness

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