Bipolar Disorder Support Group
Bipolar disorder is not just a single disorder, but a category of mood disorders marked by periods of abnormally high energy and euphoria, often accompanied by bouts of clinical depression. This is the place to talk about your experience with bipolar disorder, learn from others' experiences, and find support.
It's like being corrupt in thought and lacking empathy for about... 15 minutes to an hour. Then feeling guilty and suicidal and desperate, sometimes at the same time actually, then nothing. It's becoming scarily common for me...
(I realize guilt and no-empathy contradict, it's like experiencing two different layers of feeling I guess. I dunno.)
This girl I used to be very close with, was diagnosed with something called sociopathic tendencies to where her empathy would "shut off" like a switch had been flipped during stressful situations... But she had a traumatic childhood so that makes sense. I didn't have a similar thing happen to me.
I actually saw it happen to her once, when we did something bad accidentally and she got nervous. It's like the anxiety triggered her emotions to... recede? It wasn't a conscious choice it just sort of happened.
Anyway she's the only one I've heard of being diagnosed specifically with that, so I'm not sure how common or consistent it is. Or if that was a lay-term and it's a symptom or a different diagnosis. Although I'm pretty sure I've seen it in other people undiagnosed.
Do any of you experience something along those lines? Like feeling connected and sympathetic most of the time, but having marked episodes (not a one-time thing) where you notice your empathy fade, and is temporarily replaced with hate or a lack of all compassion.
(I realize guilt and no-empathy contradict, it's like experiencing two different layers of feeling I guess. I dunno.)
This girl I used to be very close with, was diagnosed with something called sociopathic tendencies to where her empathy would "shut off" like a switch had been flipped during stressful situations... But she had a traumatic childhood so that makes sense. I didn't have a similar thing happen to me.
I actually saw it happen to her once, when we did something bad accidentally and she got nervous. It's like the anxiety triggered her emotions to... recede? It wasn't a conscious choice it just sort of happened.
Anyway she's the only one I've heard of being diagnosed specifically with that, so I'm not sure how common or consistent it is. Or if that was a lay-term and it's a symptom or a different diagnosis. Although I'm pretty sure I've seen it in other people undiagnosed.
Do any of you experience something along those lines? Like feeling connected and sympathetic most of the time, but having marked episodes (not a one-time thing) where you notice your empathy fade, and is temporarily replaced with hate or a lack of all compassion.
It makes a lot of sense as a survival skill but... I've never been like traumatized, I guess? No childhood stuff.
Maybe though it's just during my adult life I've felt stuck a lot. But could that really cause something so severe and automatic (like you describe, just sort of happening whether there's a cause anymore or not) though????
I mean I had a verbally/emotionally abusive relationship on and off for several years, but that just caused me to distrust one person. And being in and out of psych wards, I guess. I dunno.
I feel like I wouldn't really... have a right to claim that since I've never been beaten or mistreated by anyone, other than people I've voluntarily allowed in my life.
I had one of the cats I'm cat-sitting jump up on the bed next to me when I was crying and I was like "GO THE FCK AWAY" and didn't feel anything for it, and felt quite monstrous because I promised to take good care of these cats and make them feel at-home.
And today I have all the warm, fuzzy feelings for them. I'm more empathetic with animals a lot of times than with people. It is scary thooough.
I was holding my crying friend not long ago and I didn't feel 'connected' but did so anyways because it's something I would do. I'm nurturing with most people.
Last year I got in a fight with my ex that was so bad I was screaming and puking from stress and there were other people there (partygoers LOL that's so bad I know) and later he came up to me and apologized and sobbed to me and... I held him but I didn't feel better. It was kind of like "I don't care now but I can tell you're being sincere so I'm trying."
I'm a medical assistant, a step down from a nurse. But I understand what you mean about feeling uneasy about being in the medical setting. I feel the same way when I'm the pt, but I also understand the other side of the fence-- working in the med field and having to be calm. I think that suppressing my emotions has helped me in working in the med field, but not in my personal life, let's put it that way. But I don't think that working in the med field has made suppressing my emotions worse. Does that makes sense?
I didn't cry when my grandmother died and everyone thought that was kind of odd. I didn't feel sad. I didn't feel anything. Years later, I felt extreme guilt for not feeling sad with her death and the tears came pouring out.
I wish I was a natural with animals, but I never really got the chance to be empathic towards then, or even people. Our Family only cared about Work. (In Ireland, people are stubborn as hell and refuse to let anyone be different)
I just can't handle it anymore - and my brain gives me a break, and I'm numb, dull and don't have to feel for awhile.......
SNAFU : )