I don't really know what to tell you, but please know I'm thinking of you

yo bro email me, life is tough, but there are things and stuff that can really help, it's hard to believe, but sunshine and fresh air , like taking a walk on a sunny day for a half hour, even if you walk somewhere and just sit and stare, wear a hat and sunglasses, pretend you're not there, just take life in, something in Sunshine gives you life.... maybe it's the vitamin D conversion that occurs, I don't know, I'm not a scientist with a degree or anything, just a person that is living life to the fullest and whatnot. I'm kinda drunk right now, but that's another story. I don't know what 5150 is....... I'm on disability or some shit, um, PM or some shit, I'm going for a degree in behavioral science, I figure try to help people on a real level, not this "job" shit
take a deep breath, think of monkeys throwing something.... lol
peace man, The Dude Abides.

I know rapid cycling is a nightmare, i've been there, please don't give up, your meds need adjusted or changed. It can and will get better. How are you doing this morning? Please keep in contact and let us know. Sending you hugs and prayers.

i get what you're going through man. that constant up-down, up-down would wear anyone down.
i was the same until maybe my 20th. med attempt, where i actually found 2 that combined take away those fucked-up extremes. i still do my art and hack away at my guitar, so they don't mess w/ my creativity.
get to your doctor and tell him everything you've said here. tell him you need better treatment for this disease. tell him what he's done so far hasn't worked.

just stay here, hang on tight, and allow yourself some kindness towards you.

rapid cycling can be hell, and it sounds like you are there! Just add in relationship and living situation uncertainty....it makes for a bad place.

I know you have said that pills aren't working---finding the right med combo's---and getting the right dosage is sort of an art. I rapid cycle and it is difficult. I know the "I want out" place too well. I don't want the meds to turn me into a dull zombie.

I hope you are working with a decent pdoc, if not please find one! Therapy can help--especially mindfulness based work & DBT for bipolar.

Everyone is worthy of being saved---and you look interesting besides.

I hope you find answers. (((((((((((((((((((((hugs)))))))))))))))))))))))

Ouch! I want to cry and scream with you. Sometimes it actually helps. Not often, but sometimes...

We care. Please keep on putting one foot in front of the other. You CAN get through this!

at least your keeping it real..telling it like it is.my whole interesting ( ha ha)family is bi polar..me included...the best advice i can tell you is that lifes like the ocean.ok ..we get high tides..(mania yippppeeee!)and low tides( groan depression) and we have to learn to ride them out.. all the shit that happens to us..its true what doesnt kill us makes us go stronger.and i can tell you that now..from all of the strong experiences that i have experienced..that i am fucking RESILANT..hang in their bro reach out ..you are not alone..you have some sense of community here in cyber space.. lots of big love..im not religious at all but i'll pray for us..asking for spiritual help when desperate helps..you might be suprised..

i hear you wildclaw. the days become more frequent where i want to rip the world asunder and throw myself into the gaping pit. of course i haven't had time to hike lately.

orangemonkeyee is right, nature helps.

and i FUCKING HATE IT when people say "I hope you get 'better'"

HATE IT!!!!!! like we're freaks that just need fixing. i'm my own worst enemy, too, dude.

once again i 'm drunk, and on here, feeling like my mission in life is to give advice, f#ck no I'm not perfect, far from it, but dammit I have lived almost a quarter of a century, I feel like the least I can do is reach out to people, whether it be in person or online, I feel like it's my duty, as a person, as a fellow human being, made up of molecules, fueled ultimately by the SUN, that biga$$ yellow orqng3 thiing in ht3 sky............ um, I totally forgot the topic, but, Life sucks, but life also has emotions that suck, but in retrospect the moments of awesome cool good feeli8ngs far outweigh the negative, I mean, life is worth living, I;ve feltshitty before, and felt like boom I should get outof here, but life is worth fighting for, because in the end, you become a new person, but you don't get to choose where you'reborn, or anythingl ike that, life is a gift not worth dyiung form nomatter how fucked up you feel, even though medication can give you feelings that words can't descrive, just beliveve in yourself

I don't feel like my mission here is to give advice. I feel like my free advice is worth half what I charge for it.

I come here looking for dialogue on my issues that are in need of work. I usually find it, along with priceless gems other folks have used to manage similar issues. My cycles are seldom rapid, but the rage to depression cycle is one I am achingly familiar with. A two week rage is a wicked companion. Most of the folks in my life are actually grateful for the depression. At least they can get some sleep.

Hope you get better, Lagartija... =P

I don't know what to say, except I will say a prayer for you. Rapid cycling sucks, big time. I have only had it happen to me once or twce and I was terrified. Maybe it does sound trite, but I hope you get to feeling better soon

I am sorry you are having a hard time. That does sound like a lot to deal with. Keep working with your doctor to get your meds right.