Bipolar Disorder Support Group

Bipolar disorder is not just a single disorder, but a category of mood disorders marked by periods of abnormally high energy and euphoria, often accompanied by bouts of clinical depression. This is the place to talk about your experience with bipolar disorder, learn from others' experiences, and find support.

8,884 Members

129,559 Posts

1 Online

Xtina 02/04/2013

I've been reading as much as I can about my illness & self diagnosing others on my journey! I have been rapped 10x's and physically abused for 16 years by men. I tell everyone who cares, I'm strong, I won't let that effect my life, whatever other dumb statement I could make (yes I'm hard on myself). I realize this plays a huge effect on my illness. I minimize my feelings and those I love.

I love to sing (when I'm happy). I was listening to Miranda Lambert and I have played this song a million times but, this time I heard & felt the lyrics "bruised and beatin heart". I cried I realized I hurt from this, I hurt! The imagines of being hit in my face wouldn't go away. I cried because I didn't deserve this. I was a happy giving person. I know I'm still that but fucking tons of baggage :(

deleted_user 02/04/2013

Many hugs to you Xtina - so sorry to hear that you are hurting and having such a hard time. All I can say is that you are a fighter, you've made it through all that and are still standing.

I hope that you are in therapy and keep working thru this to stay strong. Don't worry about the tons of baggage, most of us carry some too.

SunCloudJD 02/04/2013

Great big hug of comfort for you sweetie... That must be a terrible and painful burden to carry..
I agree with Sahawmn that therapy is the best course to help you through this and to help you with coping skills
There are boards on here for post traumatic stress and also sexual abuse... They may be a good support for you...x

SunCloudJD 02/04/2013

This is a link to the Post Traumatic Stress Disorder group

http://www.dailystrength.org/c/Post-Traumatic-Stress-Disorder/support-group

Breona1996 02/04/2013

I know what you are going through. I've been there myself.. I'm here if you need to talk!

john12as 02/04/2013

may you find a path to healing that opens the door to freedom...i still have chains but i still try to reach out and connect when i can, you're not alone, i minimize my feelings too (when i can actually connect with them) - i found out im codependent too

deleted_user 02/04/2013

Xtina- I see you have been a DS member for some time but I haven't seen you before so I will say Welcome! Most here are very supportive and as Sun mentioned there are boards that may be better able to help you with the abuse related issues. I wish you well.

bran really? *sighs* Not cool at all.

LavenderHippie 02/04/2013

(((((((Big Hugs))))) for you.

i'm so sorry you've been thru so much...and of course you are hurting!!
you'll be ok...healing will come, it just takes time.

i'm glad you're here with us!

Xtina 02/04/2013

Thanks Banshie ...I just went to the website that SunCloud suggested. It was helpful, so I joined.

Yes, I've been a member for a while now but only utilize the site when I have a bad break up!!!! I pray I can continue to use this site no matter what it's so helpful. The only problem is I love suffering (or seems that way).

deleted_user 02/04/2013

I'm glad you found the other group- well no need for you to suffer alone!! (((hugs)))

deleted_user 02/04/2013

Lots of great advice and I too have been through sexual and physical abuse. I find the hardest part to accept is why wouldn't anyone listen to me as a child and hold many resentment which do nothing but bring on worthlessness and self abuse. I am here and understand,feel free to message me if you need an understanding ear..Brian

Xtina 02/04/2013

.. SJ. I went to thank you on your page but your private. So thank you so much ...

tats69 02/04/2013

Nope you are not alone....but I really wish there were a trigger warning on this thread.

So sorry you have suffered like you have....don't beat yourself up....it doesn't work well at all...I and many other do the same things.

Baggage needs to be left on the plane!!! :-)

deleted_user 02/04/2013

I like to think I am leaving the baggage at the curb!!! Out with the trash...Sometimes though I forget it's not garbage day and it has to sit until the next pick-up!! Ha!

Xtina 02/04/2013

I agree baggage should be left on the plane ;)

SunCloudJD 02/04/2013

I don't know when the trauma started for you sweetie.. there are a few boards on here for sexual abuse for both adults and those who have suffered from childhood..
This is a link for a childhood sexual abuse board

http://www.dailystrength.org/groups/childhood-sexual-abuse

Join the Conversation

Posts You May Be Interested In

Sunday Check In

Posted by: GTTMbutstillme

Last Reply: Sunshinegirl0228 08/16/2026

3

Well, good morning to you!Today is National Roller Coaster Day. Are any of you going?It's also National Tell-A-Joke Day! Come up with some and share!I'm not bright with jokes these days, but I'll start:"Today I ordered a chicken and an egg from Amazon...I'll let you know." :D
Keep me in your thoughts

Posted by: confessionsofaqueen

Last Reply: SunCloudJD 08/16/2026

4

Woke up feeling very emotional and about to clock in at my place of employment. And can't place it all in writing but not been a good experience with my store manager or his boss. Defamation of my character is a concern. I've been losing appetite and weight. Trying to perform at work to keep myself from hospitalization as a result of toxic masculinity.

Sunday Check In

Keep me in your thoughts