The holidays just bring the best out of people sometimes. I live in the south...in the middle of nowhere...which I was beginning to like minus all the bugs. Well it has been like the Hatfields and McCoys with my hbs family. Threats to shoot us going up our driveway....shots fired the other night....police involved ...cop was ex bf...yay. Agreements made to stay off each others property. No arrests....ridiculous.... lies.

A lot of drama.....a lot. My family is cool...collected....nonviolent....such contrast.

I was shot at few years ago whenever I swerved around some people walking in the middle of the road. Broke my back windshield. A friend of mine was shot to death by her insane hub and mother in law a few years ago. They are putting a show about it on Bio channel Thursday.....

All this has heightened my fear and paranoia. I hear every little sound everywhere I go. I have finals next week ...and I'm worried about my baby niece who has pneumonia..

I just want a peaceable life!! To stop and take a breath. I'm tired of living in fear but don't know how to change that. My experiences have taught me there are ppl out to get you and you could be next. I think I have valid reason to be fearful.....so I'm not really paranoid but maybe the stress and real situations are leading me to be paranoid about some things. How to cope?