Ah, so he's really calling me out on being two-faced. Seems though I say I have no issues with big people my actions say otherwise. Oh man. I feel like crap. I'm all about not judging people or treating them differently for whatever reason and it seems I've been doing it all this time.

Sometimes when I recognize traits in others that I don't like I have to ask myself if I have a bit of that trait too. There's a sayin' that goes if you spot it you got it! So I try to just evaluate if there is some hidden trait in me that I see in others that I'm guilty of having too and try to correct it.

Just maybe examine why you feel this way perhaps you just have a fear of being bigger? No need to beat yourself up just think on it and change what you can.

It's a proven fact that big people do get treated differently than smaller size people so you aren't the only one who does this.

It's good that your boyfriend trusts you so much that he could point this out to you. I'm sure now that you know you do this, you will make the change necessary to not do it anymore.

I liked what nester said about "if you spot it, you got it". I used to really buck heads with my oldest stepson and I think it was because I saw some of myself in him.

I was always VERY thin.
And had a bit of distaste for "heavy" people .

Since starting BP meds I have gained almost 80 pounds. Pdoc says it's nearly impossible to lose that weight , since it changes our metabolic rates.

I now have a better understanding of heavier people . I'm not so judgmental .

What your BF said may be a way for you to understand your own personal issues with weight better ?

Um yea I kind of laughed out loud when you said that our culture glorifies big women? And that you skinny cats catch a lot of heat? Ok so I wish you could love one day in my fat body and see how you feel. Go walk around in public and see all the stairs and laughs you get. Or go for a walk to get some excercise. Thats what your supposed to do right? And during your walk you can enjoy a car load or two of highschool kids driving by to call you a fat ass or yelling at you to lose weight your disgusting!! Hey you wanna feel like a movie star? Walk out of a clothing store and see two people taking picturs of you with their cell phones and luaghing like you are a freak. Has any of this happened to you as a skinny cat? I will admit that these days they do have shows with heavy people on them. Shwing for the first time ever that we are poeple too instead of just haveing us fatties play a character in a movie that is portrayed as nasty, lazy or stupid like the typical stereotype society has labeled us with. I have been big since I was 12 years old. I am now 35 and as you said, I do not nor have I ever felt glorified being a fat person. I have grown such a hatred over the years for people. All people because of the way I have been treated. Bullied in school, skipped over for jobs, and pretty much treated like less than human. So yes your post offended me but it also is another example of how little people know about what we go thru and little time people take to care.

@Diva- I meant my culture. In Jamaica. I'm not from the US. I know it's the complete opposite there. Out here big women are very much glorified. Check out some of music videos or listen to some of our songs and you'll get what I mean. And I am so sorry my post offended you. The thing is- I do care.

@Nester- I do have a fear of being bigger which is kind of irrational because as I said the Jamaican society glorifies big women so it's not like I'd get picked on or something.

Iam, thank you for explaining.

Diva I was bullied in school and I'm normal weight. Kids can be very mean no matter what you look like.

"I'm a big girl" tho in my youth and mid 20's I was athletic, cut, the whole nine. Got a lot of attention. Since gaining weight, I still get a lot of attention. It's the way you carry yourself that makes a difference.

Good point daft!

Ok dizzy let me be clear. I was not saying that only fat kids get bullied n school. And my stories in my post happened to me as an adult.
Daft, I too was athletic in school and popular but always big. I dress nice too but I am very obese. So I don't believe that I deserve the way I have been treated because I don't carry myself well. I didnt ask for any of it
These things happen to many obese people no matter how they carry themselves. I'm glad they never happened to you.

I am sorry for posting some of my experiences with being obese.I won't mention them again. I was not saying my life was harder than anyone elses just trying to prove a point about how people who r my size get treated. And how misunderstood we are. I was 500 pounds and am losing weight but the cruelty still exists and hurts just as deep. Obviously even on ds no one gets it. I wish this
thread could be closed and forgotten. Thanx

diva - you taught me something new. I did not know that people that are so-called big had to endure that kind of abuse. Frankly, I'm shocked. I had no idea this went on. I'm overweight but I haven't experienced this level of hate. I am so sorry you have gone through this.
Large or small, we are human beings and deserve to be treated with respect.