As a recipient of the "those acts" maybe I am biased..... I could watch the perpetrator die without flinching and feel only that the world is a better place without him..... I know of 6 victims (the perpetrator is my father) and none of us have gone on the do great things.... most of us have struggled to maintain sanity/self esteem/the ability to trust. His contributions to science (he is a well known and highly respected scientist) are not a fair trade for what he has done. I have seen him watch his neighbors grand daughter and I want to run over there and warn them though since he is the respected one and I am the mentally ill one I would once again face disbelief.

Sorry..... I'll agree with you on just about anyone else.... I can not under any circumstances believe that it is ok to sacrafice the lives of children for a few advances in physics. I have urges.... I get intrusive thoughts.... but I have never acted on them when another person stands to be hurt. He made a conscious choice to act on his urges, knowing full well the damage he could do.... The idea that it is "fate" and that it was all as it should be because he had something to offer humanity doesn't go over with me. No, not a fair trade.

DivineSilence, it's totally understandable why you would feel that way and you have every right to believe what you do.

I would say that while you don't feel you've gone on to do great things, I get the impression that being who you are regardless of what you've been through is a great thing in itself. It's not always apparently obvious how much our actions truly make a difference for the world at large.

Pedophiles, cold blooded killers and animal torturers and killers don't deserve to be here. That''s a no brainer. There is evil that walks the earth. Do they deserve to be here? I'm not God but I'm giving my 2 cents.

By the way, love the title of your post. I am a rabid Alice In Chains fan.

Im totally with Divine, all the way.

I just can't help but think about the advances I might have made in the field of genetics if I hadn't been too fucked up to finish college.... think of all that was lost........ think of what I could have been.

Divine, could you still finish? I want to start grad school but my brains are scrambled right now. I am going to pull a cliche and say, never give up on you dreams.

I tried 4 times to go back to school but my mental health always got in the way..... I was never even able to finish a Bachelors..... Every time I am manic I start the process of going back again but the last 4 years I never even get to enroll before I get too paranoid or depressed. My transcripts are a joke.... I have semesters where I took 20 credits of science and got a 4.0 then the next semester I'll barely manage a 1.2 if I even finish it.... I either take an A or an F.... hardly ever anything in between. I'm satisfied with my life... I support myself and my kids and am not unhappy but I can't help but wonder what could have been had my life been different.

The road not taken. I gave up on my dreams of becoming a Forensic Anthropologist. It would mean grad school and a doctorate program. So not up for that. So I am just going to live the best life I can. This illness robs us of so much.

We can only fool ourselves into believing the grass is greener on the other side. While this "illness" is a challenge, the peace and joy we do eventually get to experience is all the more sweeter.

True Lee. I was in a manic state I am just coming out of. It was a hellacious manic state and not the happy kind. I'm just grateful to feel hope and faith again.

I like what ekatepnha has to say... I went through a period wondering if I had narcissistic traits..due to ptsd unresolved... it really bothered my a lot... fortunately my pdoc he saw no evidence of it at all.. but it can almost seem self absorbed... that inner turmoil of never having childhood resolved or the pain quashed or dealt with...fortunately there are now good and safe ways to do that.. I also agree with DS.. that we are not here to be subjected to the torture or delight of those who want to use us as a toy to satisfy their demons..it unfortunately is then with us forever the sickness that those who procreate often for reasons of fulfilling their own twisted power...I do believe we deserve to be here .. I also believe unless one is completely delusional we have to choose good or evil..if we are conflicted I think there is a lot of help out there to overcome it if we want to... I think that there are a lot of answers that we may never have at least in this world.. so we do the best we can with the tools we have..x