Bipolar Disorder Support Group

Bipolar disorder is not just a single disorder, but a category of mood disorders marked by periods of abnormally high energy and euphoria, often accompanied by bouts of clinical depression. This is the place to talk about your experience with bipolar disorder, learn from others' experiences, and find support.

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TinMan26 11/07/2013

My mind never, ever stops, playing out scenarios of doom and gloom with everything I do, making me miserable and want a break from it, I have nothing that comes to me but negative usually in my mind even though that isn't the case or reality at all most cases, I have relationship issues looming now, I have no peace in a single person and am trying to find it in myself and with myself, I am dieing for contact and people to talk to as I have isolated most everything as far as friends, I work all the time, and my mind torments me all the time, I have almost destroyed my marriage and am trying to repair it, and jealousy overtakes me and the control I always portrayed always tries to come back, I don't treat loved ones like they are people with a mind to decide and be a person as I always think there is some motive that is out to hurt me, I have had a hard time just with the human experience lately and I want to level out just to see life fresh and new and peaceful for what I feel is the first time in my life without turmoil, I wish I could stop the hamster wheel in my head and feel that if it continues it will destroy me, my mind never lets me rest, at all, and I don't want more meds, but will end up with more if I can't get control, tell me, is this a root feeling for someone that is Bi Polar? I have my p doc and therapy, and never can get enough contact or time, I have such an urge and desire just to have friends that it is killing me.

deleted_user 11/07/2013

I have felt nearly enough to kinda understand. I could not work or even do things like food shopping. Simple stuff. Thanks to The Lord, I have two trustable Dr.'s. I hope you find one and repeat what you just posted. Keep in touch.

mayismerry 11/07/2013

Sorry to hear this. It sounds like you have "monkey mind". You are clinging onto thoughts as they go by like they are reality. Thoughts are just thoughts...say a thought is just a thought or a feeling is just a feeling. That is all they are we don't have to cling on to them like they are the concrete truth. Thoughts are random many times without any rhyme or reason. Don't jump on the train...let them go by like a train on the tracks. It is okay to feel what your feeling just know that feelings come go like waves and are not permanent. It is okay..you are a fine person...you just have random thoughts that run thru your mind , and then you jump onto them instead of letting them just be a thought..this causes you to feel upset and get into emotional mind. There are 3 mind states and you can read about them here and get some relief. You have all 3 and use all 3. Sometimes we just don't acknowledge and validate ourselves when using the other 2 (reasonable and wise).

Here is a link to maybe help:

http://dbtselfhelp.com/html/mind_states.html

You are a valid human being and are wise. You came here for support and that is very wise and loving to yourself.

Take care

TinMan26 11/07/2013

I isolate myself in public settings usually, able to ignore most the world around me and stay in my head, which isn't a great place to be, I have a great p doc, just never get enough time, once every couple weeks isn't enough, thank you very much for the reply, I do hope I can get the demons in my mind to stop telling me such useless garbage that hurts me constant.

TinMan26 11/07/2013

Wow MayisMerry, you nailed it, I take thoughts and try to make them reality, no matter how out there they are, that someone has this or that intention, that they thought this and will say that next, that they are lieing and I will get the truth, all the things are negative things also, never hey he will say he has money for me, or something silly or beneficial, I am so just spent with my brain, I have to think a million miles an hour already in my profession, and my mind never stops, when I subdue one thought, there is another one ready to take its place and torment me, I am looking at the link, and appreciate it greatly.

mayismerry 11/07/2013

Here is a few more links on cognitive thinking errors:

http://psychcentral.com/lib/15-common-cognitive-distortions/0002153

http://www.webmd.com/balance/features/common-thinking-errors

mayismerry 11/07/2013

See it is okay...we all do this to a point..mine have been pretty overwhelming so I understand. It helps to know this stuff. It makes a person feel better and like there are ways to handle these situations.

TinMan26 11/07/2013

It certainly helps tons to feel others out there, I need discussion to help calm me badly...

mayismerry 11/07/2013

An article on how to fix these errors.. also it helps to find a therapist who will support and guide sometimes.

http://psychcentral.com/lib/fixing-cognitive-distortions/0002154

TinMan26 11/07/2013

All such links are appreciated and archived, I will be digging into them, I need such clarity, such a needy person I am, I really get weary of feeling such defeat in needing to be calmed all the time, makes for not so happy an experience.

sigmund2 11/07/2013

the only way I can avoid doom and gloom is throughe religion. I believe g-d has a plan. I believe he ultimately wants what is best for us. That is how I combat negativity.

in answer to your question, constant negativity I do not think is a trait of the disorder. I say that because is ur man I think you should be able to be a little bit optimistic even if there is no overwhelming reason to be. That is part of what I mania. some people have depression and an irritable mania however I don't believe that's bipolar disorder but something else.

SunCloudJD 11/08/2013

HI and Welcome Tinman

Intrusive thoughts suck and can be overwhelming... If this is ongoing you might need to either increase your meds or try something new..

It sounds "to me" like you might be struggling with some concurrent problems if you are struggling with jealousy and control... That sounds like personality .. Therapy is what can help with this...Usually a behaviour type of therapy...

If I were you I'd find a way to make the time Tin... Life's short and we only have one go round... Your pdoc and therapist can help you a great deal but they need to be on board

Big hug of comfort for you and a blessing...x

TinMan26 11/08/2013

Thanks so much, I have a great therapist, I actually chose to move to a male therapist just because I wanted his insight into the male traits a bit more, not saying a female can't give them, it just alleviated a ton of distraction thoughts moving to him for me, I actually have a Bi Polar 2 diagnosis, and wonder if that is the case as I know my thoughts are all over the place and spectrum all the time, my mind never stops, some from fear and guilt as to what I have done and been, and some that has always been there that I ran from and did things to regret later thinking that was my answer, I know I write and talk almost encrypted, I write and talk very fast and view and read very fast, I can go over 6 months of posts in about 5 minutes, and gather all the info fairly well at what I see, I do love and need contact and long term talking to and these things tend to calm and leave me alone more, I need my mind to leave me alone, I appreciate your kind words more than you can imagine. Much love and thanks

SunCloudJD 11/08/2013

I think Sigmund is talking about dysphoric mania or a mixed state and they are miserable...I've been there as well...

I still think jealousy and control is personality related though

Here's the symptoms of a mixed state

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dysphoric_mania

TinMan26 11/08/2013

Mixed state certainly describes me a ton, I agree personality wise, I know I am re training myself, and know my dad was this same way, I wish I had a switch, but I haven't found it yet, when I don't let these feelings and thoughts out to others, it goes well for me, I would choose that all the time as it benefits me most, I have been better, but it is physically painful at times to not lash out, I feel defeated and like someone is getting over on me by keeping them in, and maybe they are, but things still go well for me when I deal with my feelings myself and not bring issues to loved ones close to me.

SunCloudJD 11/08/2013

A cognitive type of therapy can help a ton with changing thinking patterns... A lot of people swear by DBT

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