Meditation?
You are probably too hard on yourself (not that bipolars do that!).
Enjoy your peaceful moments and go with it, without trying to analyze it. F L O W with it.

i don't think this is ot...i know i feel the same way much of the time. i think this is more a symptom of how our thinking is affected by mi, whether it is bp or schizoaffective.
hugs and puppy kisses

Aw chilvr...puppy kisses! That is so sweet!!
I will join you in a dobie slobber for Mark.

haha ok i laughed out loud at that! Thanks for the kisses!!

Back to you! :)

I get this way, too. The anxiety can be sooo intrusive.

There is a lot about Cognitive therapy and mindfulness on the net... It might help you sweetie

Big hug of calm for you...xo

thanks Sensitive, thanks Jan!

I struggle with anxiety and a longing for peace too. A lot. If I push through my days and block the "ruminating" the anxiety will inevitably rear it's ugly head while I am sleeping - nightmares. Or, I will finally be overcome by it and just explode.

Yoga has helped me some. It sort of clears the mind and helps you focus on breathing and your physical responses. Swimming is great. Honestly, I don't want to listen to the moment. That is why I push myself to exhaustion so I can sleep well and not have to be alone with me. Reading, games, cooking, cleaning - anything I can do to keep me from having to think.

Sorry, Mark. I know that is not a helpful answer. Just want you to know you are not alone.

You deserve peace. My sense of you is you are one of the kindest people on DS. I hope you can see that in yourself.

thank you SO much Gilded. You are very very kind!
I like what you wrote. It gave me a sense of what to do too.
SO it was helpful and I appreciate it!

Peace,

M