Was discharged from hospital today after 5 days getting my meds tweaked. My paranoia was so severe I started hearing voices again. But that's not what's troubling me. I'm sure I told you I have 3 sisters,one of whom never talks to me (which I should probably be thankful for) and the other 2 are in and out of my life. Friday morning Carla,the owner of the group home where I live,insisted I needed to go inpatient. I was supposed to do some errands for the eldest sister and I was afraid to call her about Carla's and my decision,so I asked Carla to call. Same old thing: "Oh,I don't think that's necessary." The other sister I never call because if I do,I get my face ripped off (she's the angriest person I know). So they knew I was in hospital and having problems again,but they never called or visited. Probably the thing that angers me most is that they claim to understand my illness,when clearly they don't. I shouldn't even be surprised. And they both knew I was getting sick again but they did nothing except,as usual, run off at the mouth.
I see the new tdoc on Monday,and my appt. with my pdoc is Mar. 15. I should never have quit therapy,of course as Judge Judy says, "Woulda,coulda, shoulda". I've been a real mess but I do feel much better now. The voices and racing thoughts are gone. I have an enemy here now,I've tried to stave that off as long as I could, but after insult piled upon insult,I finally snapped (it was the proverbial straw that broke the camel's back).