Sounds like depression to me, maybe even a touch of mixed.

i'm depressed too, now the question is, what kind of med?

Yes it does sound like depression especially if you are wanting to not be alive.

Med change?

Could be depression or another physical problem like anemia. Better check with your doc!

Depression sux thts fer sure. I hope ya feel better.
Big hugs((())

Very clearly sounds like depression. The fact that depression always include suicidal feelings is a misnomer. You can be depressed to the point of not wanting to exist, without being suicidal...it's just a matter of existing being too hard, taking too much energy, breath, etc.

If your BiPolar you can't just take an Anti-Depressant for Depression it will throw you into a manic state, you have to take a Mood Stabilizer and an Anti-Depressant, and there are dozens of possible combinations.

Your Pdoc should have a recommendation of what he want's you to try. I've had BP w/suicidal depression for 23 yrs and used Lithium w/Lexapro until a month ago and switched to Tegretol w/Lexapro. Both combo's worked well.

Ha!!!! "I wish I would go to sleep and never wake up"!!!
Okay, that's the 5th time I've read that on the board, in the last 2 or 3 weeks!!!
I'm keeping count.

I know that's exactly what I long for, whenever I'm depressed.

I'm really thinking that the change of season is affecting many of us!!!

Maybe that's what's going on with you?

What you describe could certainly be depression, but there are other things that could cause a lot of your symptoms, too.

I'm sorry you've been spiraling down.
Is there anything you can do about it now? Med-wise, perhaps?

If this has been going on for a while now and is only getting worse, it would be best to act now, before it gets really, really bad. Worse than it is now.

I hope you feel better soon.

((((((Hugs)))))

Yes you are definatly describing depression, ive been there, at times im still there. You havent said if you are seeing a therapist. Im assuming you arent. So i suggest that you find one right away. Pick up the phone and find one right now. No one is going to do it for you. By finding this site and asking your question i think you are ready to start healing. Keep posting even if you cant find or make sense of the words that you type. Talking, rambling, any sort of communication can be therapeutic even if its not with a therapist.

Seasonal changes do affect people, it's called Seasonal Affective Disorder or S.A.D. it also comes from a lack of Vitamin D in the winter months from lack of Sunshine. If your prone to depression it's a good thing to take Vit. D as a Supplement in the Fall and Winter months, 1000 - 2000 I.U. day.

thank you to every one who answered this.

I'm considering every thing every one said I'm just slow right now.

I'm on an antidepressant and a mood stabilizer all though I feel I could be on something else. My med choices are limited and I get life threatening dystonia on most anti psychotics which leaves me with anti consultants.

I've been having bad luck with medications lately as I'm sensitive to most of them. I've been having bad side effects that are unbearable with a lot of medications.

I will be making a call to my doctor. '

It's also that time of the month so I'm sure that's effecting me too.