I was raised with a mother who treats illness with as natural a remedy as possible (herbs, vitamin supplements etc), she is 67 and only recently and reluctantly started a hypertension med. She talks to me about how lack of proper vitamins/minerals are linked to mental illness. Vit. B's, C's, folic acid, omegas, etc. I'm sure many of you have read something about them and mental illness. And I do feel that there is something to it. She also brings up the side effects that alot of the meds that treat bipolar disorder have.

Then I have the pdoc, of course, wanting me to continue taking my meds until we find the right "cocktail", which we have been working on for just over 2 freaking years now. We had a major setback for about 6months with meds because of my gallbladder. I was getting horribly sick around the time I would try a new med and come to find out, I needed my gallbladder removed.

Then my counselor gives me these books on women's physical and emotional health. And tells me how when a woman suffers from such severe pms as I do, it's one of the bodies ways of telling us there are unresolved issues that need to be worked on and they can follow into menopause if the aren't resolved. I just turned 41!

Now I'm going back and forth telling myself, I just need to go on birth control pills and that will fix me, the bipolar meds are just going to make me sick and kill me, I can take vitamins and be just fine. I have a pdoc appt 2moro and think he's probably going to fire me and am considering canceling it. HELP! WTH???