Bipolar Disorder Support Group
Bipolar disorder is not just a single disorder, but a category of mood disorders marked by periods of abnormally high energy and euphoria, often accompanied by bouts of clinical depression. This is the place to talk about your experience with bipolar disorder, learn from others' experiences, and find support.
I know i've said this over and over, but I feel like everything is falling apart again. I don't know how to cope anymore and all I can think about is I don't want to be here. It's the only way I can see out of this horrible nightmare.
I had a therapy appointment but we go over the same thing every time. "Challange and change your thinking". 4 Years! 4 years now since I saw my first psychiatrist and I'm in the same cycle. I start to do better, I get so far and then the depression just rears it's ugly head and slaps me in the face. Each time I fall back I fall back harder and it takes longer to get back up. Each time it just reinforces my belief that things can't change, that it's always going to be like this which obviously keeps me depressed.
I don't know how much more I can take, how do I do it? Where do I get that motivation to keep going from?
Mum said to me earlier after trying to talk to her, "so what are you going to do now then to keep yourself busy"... I feel like ripping my hair out at the very idea of just carrying on like everything is fine. It's like my head is screaming constantly. Everything around me seems dim and slowed down compared with what's going on in me at the moment. I'm just ready to give up but no one around me wants to. I feel so stuck.
x-Bliss-x
I had a therapy appointment but we go over the same thing every time. "Challange and change your thinking". 4 Years! 4 years now since I saw my first psychiatrist and I'm in the same cycle. I start to do better, I get so far and then the depression just rears it's ugly head and slaps me in the face. Each time I fall back I fall back harder and it takes longer to get back up. Each time it just reinforces my belief that things can't change, that it's always going to be like this which obviously keeps me depressed.
I don't know how much more I can take, how do I do it? Where do I get that motivation to keep going from?
Mum said to me earlier after trying to talk to her, "so what are you going to do now then to keep yourself busy"... I feel like ripping my hair out at the very idea of just carrying on like everything is fine. It's like my head is screaming constantly. Everything around me seems dim and slowed down compared with what's going on in me at the moment. I'm just ready to give up but no one around me wants to. I feel so stuck.
x-Bliss-x
I had no idea i would be in this position. I cannot talk to anyone about it because it seems noone understands the deep pain i am in. I tried to talk to someone the other day. I tested the waters with them, to fidn out how supportive they would be. I used the word "depressed." He said, "You're smarter than that."
This is not a disease that someone can just shake themselves out of. It's not something one can just "keep oneself busy." Not rolled-up in a ball, in bed. I feel for you.
x-Bliss-x