Bipolar Disorder Support Group

Bipolar disorder is not just a single disorder, but a category of mood disorders marked by periods of abnormally high energy and euphoria, often accompanied by bouts of clinical depression. This is the place to talk about your experience with bipolar disorder, learn from others' experiences, and find support.

8,884 Members

129,554 Posts

0 Online

HannaHana 03/16/2011

Teach my children to appreciate what they have? My children (11 and 8) think that I'm acting like I don't care about them when I make them clean their room. I've threatened to take anything that I clean in their room to either the garbage or goodwill.

I also found a nearby soup kitchen that I called about volunteering at with my children. I happened to post it on my facebook that, that was my plan and my daughter posted to my thread that she'd "at least be helping someone out, and if that was some sort of punishment, it wouldn't work".

I promptly said "So you want to help someone who needs it?" She agreed. I said "What about me?...Don't I deserve some help?" She said "yes". But then she (and my son) still didn't clean their room.

I'm going in there and they're losing whatever is not in it's correct place... but How Do I teach my kids to appreciate anything??

deleted_user 03/16/2011

If they want something let them by it with there own money. Don't give them pocket money. If they wash the dishes they get a certain amout of money for it. Any work they do around the house like wash the car, clean there room, ect. Hope it helps.

HannaHana 03/16/2011

thanks Linkie...it sounds like a great idea, but after paying for all of my bills and such, there's nothing left for me to allot for my kids' allowance.

deleted_user 03/16/2011

Then maybe take away there stuff like you said. They will be mad but will get over it

deleted_user 03/16/2011

At one point we had to take everything in my son's room and just leave him with pajamas, and changes of clothing and everything toys etc. He had to earn everything and I mean everything back. Completely stripped his room toys, clothes everything. He had a set of clothes to wear every day but not more than 7 for the 7 days in the week and he was not allowed to pick out which clothes he got.

tommymott 03/16/2011

Your kids will NOT get over you arbitrarily removing items from their room due to your decision about what is the "right" place for it to be. I think both you and your kids need a a change of attitude. For instance, you could impound errant items for a week then return them. This will be better than getting rid of things which only teaches kids that adults are mean and unreasonable. You could present your kids with a special outing to be made depending on their performance. Introduce your kids to altruistic principles. In the long run they'll have to decide for themselves.

deleted_user 03/16/2011

Oh I"m sorry no toys is what I meant to say.

Marilyanna 03/16/2011

If they do have an enormouse amount of toys tell them that they need to pick out 5 games or toys this month to give to a kids charity.

They might give a marble or something little but let itpass. Next month do the same thing if they were greedy the first month.

You might add 5 of your thigs too. have them go with you to the drop off place.

Do you pay your bills bycheck?

Sit at the table and you write the check and and have your eleven year old put the check and bill in the envelope, and seal the envelope. Have the 8 year old stick on the stamp. so they see where the money goes. Leftover money (Or fake checks) go into envelopes for "food" lunch money" eyc.

Dont nag them about being irresponsible..

When they do smething responsible praise them for it no matter how small.

Join the Conversation