Bipolar Disorder Support Group
Bipolar disorder is not just a single disorder, but a category of mood disorders marked by periods of abnormally high energy and euphoria, often accompanied by bouts of clinical depression. This is the place to talk about your experience with bipolar disorder, learn from others' experiences, and find support.
I started ECT awhile back and so far have had 9 treatments and it's sorta working. I'm less suicidal but still depressed but now I have a massive problem. I lost some memories during it and rather than telling people I lied and told people I remember them and what there talking about. It's so scary sometimes I just cry when no one is home because I don't know what to do with myself. I told my mom the other day I couldn't remember someone and tried to explain it to her but she doesn't get it and I feel so lost and alone. Any been through this?
deleted_user
Dear Oleander: I have lost pretty much all of 2002/2003 when I had two rounds of ECT. I even lost a memory of a vacation I spent with my husband where I rode an ATV in some sand dunes! Luckily I take plenty of photos so have them to jog my memory. As for being forgetful I just look the person straight in the eye and tell them I can't remember what they're referring to. No explainations necessary. If they want to think I'm forgetful then that's their issues not mine. So chin up, stand tall and tell the truth.
deleted_user
I lost a lot of memories of my first two years of college. I really cant remember them after ECT. I dont remember my first time ever having sex and my ex kept trying to tell me what happened to help me remember but for the life of me I cant. ECT was hell for me and I wish my parents would have had my back when things went down. I hope you are going to therapy so you can tell someone what is going down. You dont deserve to go thru this alone.
deleted_user
sorry your feeling so bad
deleted_user
I had ECT and lost memory. The doctor said that is normal.
oleander1984
I wish they would have explained that BEFORE I lost the memories, I don't know that I would have done it then. Does anyone also get really bad anger issues. I'm always yelling at someone or other and right now I'm just so damn ready to die and for the life of me don't understand it. Before when I actually tried it I understand why I was doing it and why I wished I was dead now I just want to be gone, never to have lived. It's all so damn confusing.
deleted_user
I went to an ECT board complaining about my loss of memory, they pretty much told me to stop whining and make some new ones. Needless to say I didn't go back there. Losing one's memories is like losing part of yourself and you know you will never get it back.
deleted_user
I went to an ECT board complaining about my loss of memory, they pretty much told me to stop whining and make some new ones. Needless to say I didn't go back there. Losing one's memories is like losing part of yourself and you know you will never get it back.
deleted_user
hmmm, it's the price you pay..i had very similiar experience re-memory loss...maybe try and keep the ect to a minimum, if possible...less ect, less memory damage? It's very confusing and disorientating, forgetting people, etc.
oleander1984
I don't really have much choice, they told me they pretty much were out of ideas after I had been in a mental hospital for the fourth time so they made it sound like this was the only option. If I don't do ECT and see my shrink I will end up back in the hospital because I get so bad that noone can control me and I hurt myself and try to kill myself. Somedays I wish I was never born why did my parents ever have to have me.
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