My manic episodes tend to be so intense that I believe I have heard the entire world breathing sighs of relief when the depression wave hits. In my depressed mode, I am at least easier to find. I get lots of help maintaining my depressions for as long as possible.

It is, however, a horribly dark place to live. My family may prefer my depressions, and I can even understand preferring that over wondering which country officials will be calling about me next, butta, butta, butta... That family preference ranks high in my trust issues.

The only thing harder than finding a balance is keeping a balance.

The thing with being a bipolar is realizing, that even with meds, we are not meant to be "balanced". Thats what gets us everytime. we are different. But we are special too. I'm sorry, but "norms' are kinda boring. Us folk can have 100 ideas in our head and once, while many norms seem to have a prob with one. ha. Whoever titled our bipolarism as a curse has got it in our heads that it is so. And what do we do? we fight it...tooth and nail. I need my meds to slow er down a bit and then to keep me from sinking to far. But us folk feel more, dream more, perhaps even love more. We see things in people that others dont see...perhaps in themselves. The only downside is that we tend to hurt more. We feel down to our soul.......

I understand what you mean. I hope it soon passes for you. I call it my sinking sand moment. Thankfully i have a very good support network who help me through these times.

I too find depression exhausting. Although one of my good friends says she can cope with my depression more than mania.
It can be hard to get out of that hole. When I am in a depression I sit down with my husband and a close friend and they help me find the positives in life.

My depressions come on...like sliding on an ice blue sheet of ice...down into the blackish blue of depression.
I can't stop them either.