Bipolar Disorder Support Group
Bipolar disorder is not just a single disorder, but a category of mood disorders marked by periods of abnormally high energy and euphoria, often accompanied by bouts of clinical depression. This is the place to talk about your experience with bipolar disorder, learn from others' experiences, and find support.
Life update, well SINCE I'VE NEVER DONE ONE OF THESE actually on the contrary Life. Account? Edict? Manifesto????? Fundamentals, Dynamics [which I use in tandem, not synonymously but mutually exclusively a lot] of my life.
Annnnnnywho.*sigh* My two female best friends are a shadow of their former selves in the friendly duties department. One of the two ran off with a boy, Ive heard from her all of twice, and seen her all of once in the past 4 months since, and our only communication objective was to work towards the common goal of finding her a place to crash for the night. The other will only correspond with you on the regular if youre a male figure shes interested in. *siiiiiigh*
And, dont get me wrong, not even for a second-- I advocate whatever it takes to make them happy while not at the expense of another [except maybe me], which, is why Im not raising hell about it. But for me it SUCKS.
And I have friends oplenty, a plethora, not to brag, [accumulated over the years] but they are, for the overwhelming majority, male. And with an exception of maybe 4 or 5 [I actually counted], Ive gotten many a love confession, or the equal lesser crush confession? And they all hit on me.
I dont know /why/, and, I dont mean to sound uppity, at all. I dont think its tooting ones own horn or massaging their ego to call it like it is, a genius is a genius, an innovator is an innovator, and so on and so forth. And most of my friends just so happen to like me. Haters gon' hate. Lol. [Yea, Im baffled at this phenomenon, too, Im right there with ye.]
But, male attention is lovely, males are gods gift to me. [Females as well, I think both sexes are equally as wonderful and they are both equally as appealing to me, Im not Gay or Straight Im PICKY] But.. I want a friend who actually wont hit on me, somebody who wont complicate me further, somebody with whom it doesnt have to be that.
And thats what Ive lost. I am crestfallen Somber. Lonely. The most human of all feelings and the most godawful feeling of all human feelings is a sense of loss.
I just want a friend. Just a friend. It's OK if you like me, or don't [Not that anyone here does in fact I'm sure not], not intending to make it sound like "I don't want any more friends with feelings for me", it's like how every square is a rectangle but not every rectangle's a square. I'd love a new friend, any friend. But a friend who could JUST be my friend and always be /just a friend/ would be something special and sacred to me.
It just seems like every girl, every woman has a best friend but me, and on an intellectual level I know that is a fallacy through and through, on so many levels, and is nothing more than a mere stereotype and an ideal, but it still kind of triggers a twinge of pain, a "sting" when I see best friends doing "best friend things". Spongebob and Patrick for instance. Beavis and Butthead. Ugh. Gonna stop thinking about this, now. >___
Annnnnnywho.*sigh* My two female best friends are a shadow of their former selves in the friendly duties department. One of the two ran off with a boy, Ive heard from her all of twice, and seen her all of once in the past 4 months since, and our only communication objective was to work towards the common goal of finding her a place to crash for the night. The other will only correspond with you on the regular if youre a male figure shes interested in. *siiiiiigh*
And, dont get me wrong, not even for a second-- I advocate whatever it takes to make them happy while not at the expense of another [except maybe me], which, is why Im not raising hell about it. But for me it SUCKS.
And I have friends oplenty, a plethora, not to brag, [accumulated over the years] but they are, for the overwhelming majority, male. And with an exception of maybe 4 or 5 [I actually counted], Ive gotten many a love confession, or the equal lesser crush confession? And they all hit on me.
I dont know /why/, and, I dont mean to sound uppity, at all. I dont think its tooting ones own horn or massaging their ego to call it like it is, a genius is a genius, an innovator is an innovator, and so on and so forth. And most of my friends just so happen to like me. Haters gon' hate. Lol. [Yea, Im baffled at this phenomenon, too, Im right there with ye.]
But, male attention is lovely, males are gods gift to me. [Females as well, I think both sexes are equally as wonderful and they are both equally as appealing to me, Im not Gay or Straight Im PICKY] But.. I want a friend who actually wont hit on me, somebody who wont complicate me further, somebody with whom it doesnt have to be that.
And thats what Ive lost. I am crestfallen Somber. Lonely. The most human of all feelings and the most godawful feeling of all human feelings is a sense of loss.
I just want a friend. Just a friend. It's OK if you like me, or don't [Not that anyone here does in fact I'm sure not], not intending to make it sound like "I don't want any more friends with feelings for me", it's like how every square is a rectangle but not every rectangle's a square. I'd love a new friend, any friend. But a friend who could JUST be my friend and always be /just a friend/ would be something special and sacred to me.
It just seems like every girl, every woman has a best friend but me, and on an intellectual level I know that is a fallacy through and through, on so many levels, and is nothing more than a mere stereotype and an ideal, but it still kind of triggers a twinge of pain, a "sting" when I see best friends doing "best friend things". Spongebob and Patrick for instance. Beavis and Butthead. Ugh. Gonna stop thinking about this, now. >___
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Is here for your viewing pleasure! Mom and I have some errands to run. Camera is up so I can check in on Copper puppy while we are out. Let's see how that goes. How are you today?
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Which explains the mysterious fevers and my extra fatigue. I'm so glad I pushed for answers.
I'm blessed to have a true BFF who has been in my life for 33 years and accepts me for who I am. Unfortunately, we don't live close enough to each other.
I'm not trying to sound totally negative but rather have personally become very self aware of how I can be and more self aware of what non beepers think of us.
Maybe do a self evaluation and see what you find that might be causing people to keep their distance. Remember their is a difference between true friends and a boat load of acquaintances.
Isn't it the hardest of times to make human contact? Texting and email just don't quite qualify do they?
Hugs Sweetie it will get better!
I'm writing a short story serial about the adventures of H.P. Lovecraft and Nikola Tesla whose mortal enemy is Edgar Cayce and they're all out of phase with time and space and get to have lots of interesting adventures. As an illustrator and photographer I'm going a lot of pictures for it and am going to make it an online series.
I'm fairly smart. Terrible with grammar but that's the dyslexia and all that crap. Anyway - I'm an interesting person to kinda know if anyone want to know me and all that. I need friends because I work in a little studio that overlooks downtown and don't talk to a soul. It's easier when you're young to find friends. When you're approaching 40 and have pink hair.....not so much. Also I'm shy around real people. ;-P
Cheers :D
BTW: All my friends in life were always guys too, but they didn't hit on me, or if they did I was pretty blind to it. Yeah.....I usually feel ugly so probably didn't know any better. ;-P I was never much of a girlie girl I guess, I always wanted to go adventuring.
I have lots of cyber friends & im grateful for them
Friendship is really hard even without a mental illness, and I think having one makes it even harder. :( Maybe you can find some friends here on DS, I sure have.
My "best" friends, and even my mom - Good piece of ass? GONE! LOL no phone, plans, even loyalty - POOF!
My best female relationships - much later in life : ) Now I miss the GUYS!
If you want friends, you have to be a friend is my motto - I do the asking, and I don't get hurt if they can't. Gina's lesson, 128,38949
next week : )
I've seen them turn into music threads, discussion about cars, petunia's and laughter!
Relax : )
I did not mean to Jack another new members thread! Sorry, Voltaire - great topic, post... Glad your here
Take my mind off me!
I'm very alone, and sometimes very lonely - today, I feel if I had a friend or family, I'd be doing or finishing the back yard. Instead of sad, alone and typing you on DS...
Which is better than NOT ((((BIG HUG)))))
I had it with my mom as an adult and have that comfort that comes with true and deep friendship with a couple of people...
I agree with Gina as well though.. It's important that we recognize that we can foster that close bond by being a good friend...x
glad i'm ugly. people fall for me for me, so i don't have to contend with the bullshit.
I mean honestly I would say there are perks to being considered "beautiful" but there are pro's and con's just like being ugly.
After having been ugly and having been "beautiful", no, I wouldn't say one or the other necessarily has it better.
There's no denying the special treatment and kindness "beautiful people" receive vs. "ugly people", but you know what, I said you know what to society's twisted conventions along time ago.
I'm extremely blunt [not in a cut-throat way] plus I am weird and startlingly up-front about everything. It's my high-risk, high-return strategy to weed out the fakes, the flakes, and everyone who befriended me for my exterior.
I've gained some valueble, incredible, remarkable friends because of it, I'm very satisfied with my friend base but it just always becomes more, one-sidedly or two sidedly and I'm tired of that. >___<
And I will be friends with all of you, yesssahhh. :D Just shoot me a message or hug er request or something. xD
I appreciate the welcoming with open arms thing.
Also I'm extremely feminine looking and I love that. It catches people off gaurd when they begin to navigate the corridors of my personality and all of its facets.
Whichever facet has the floor determines my persona, most of the time I'm strictly feminine in nature, or 50/50 Androgynous.
I would even cross dress if I could afford kodona [boy-style] or better yet, Elegant Gothic Aristocrat [EGA].
All in all I'm far more aggressive and fiery and blunt than most females, I find. my humour's sort of observational, so sometimes I point things out [in a joking context] but if you can't take the heat it'll come off as either weird or mean-spirited. But it's not! Dx Never is, well weird, yes, mean? No, I don't think so.