Yes.

quite cruel to know the beauties of normality and then have it snatched so quickly i think.

That is when I live my fullest life, between episodes - but during and episode, I know I have to eat, sleep and put gas in the car!

I don't think "normal" anything - I think of when I'm my most productive,without consequences! LOL

With hard work - my episodes are fewer, and shorter - Life can be good, not just teased : )

i guess thats what i mean, normal = productive / healthy.

i find it so hard to find equilibrium and i am unmedicated.

my episodes are getting more intense, closer together and these periods of substantial health are getting shorter and more rare.

dont quite know if i can deal with this !

Your in university - that alone sucks, between school and parties - I can't imagine balance LOL I never had it : )

(((BIg HUG))))

Life can get better, and we all have bad days, weeks, and yes - I've had bad years, and meds did not help stable - I had to change my habits and thoughts....

No "calm" stable times till after 25 when I quit partying and studying...

Then it was Work and party : )

You will make it, and shine! Your smart and funny, it does Get better ....

thanks gina, not in uni yet though ! thats next year lol ! x

A line I used often - still do...

Only something that feels so GOOD - can hurt so bad : )

My tdoc told me QUIT thinking everything is up or down, bipolar - IT'S JUST LIFE : ) xox

thats true !
but life is up and down and i am up and down in the midst of instability making life very difficult to lead in an already difficult context !!