I had the roof of my house removed because it was "oppressing me". My crack addict boyfriend thought that was a great idea (he was a contractor).


Did lots of shopping and home improvements and cleaning.

The scariest thing was hanging out at the laundromat in the middle of the night with the homeless people.

gave away all my possessions...
burned all my artwork/paintings,papers, passport, etc....
threw my laptop and my phone in the lake...

left, and got lost.

i thought the world was going to end.

I decided to sponge paint my bathroom using the paint we had left over from another project at 12;:00 at night. I ran out of paint and just changed to a different color and kept going. It looked awful.

Ran away from home, about a thousand miles, with two guys who were AWOL from the army. I wanted to assume a new identity.

When caught, weeks later, I resisted arrest and injured an officer.

Lots of sex and drugs, alcohol and wild times litter my past, but hopefully not my future.

gone snowboarding/skying and not knowing how

you know the typical running the streets at 3 am and getting stopped by the cops but there where time when i would get in fights with peopel about anything over anything in a crazed rage nothing about anything then i got this idea about a movie and strated living the life i had like i was in one trying to get my adrenaline up at all times like i need that then in the depressed state i would think of that as recovery there where all kids of thought at the the time i have now started writing about it and taking class to make it real well as real as i can make it now you know the time i spent had to be worth something there is the typical then the plan insane if i hadnt thought of the movie i may have got help a lot sooner but now i am better and doing things that are getting me throught and no more 3 am runs

This still disturbs me, but on an alcohol binge/sex binge... With this guy on drugs. We had sex infront of others who were online. I feel gross about it. But at the time, it was funny... etc... Ugh.
A month earlier to that, I cheated on my bf, I never went into work and instead caught a bus to a different city to drink more. Then, I caught a bus back to the city I lived... and my housemates were upset and telling me to come back to them. So, by the time my bus arrived, I caught the next bus to a different city to drink and party more. Then when I arrived home, I self harmed and they called my parents, etc... Then I went cold turkey off my meds into a drinking binge until my parents came and brought me back home to live with them. Now I am living at home.
Oh, and in that time I purged (bulimia), self harmed, took too many xanax, shop lifted, stole money from my one best friend/housemate to drink more. Ended up going out with my stripper friend, and we ended up in this hotel drinking more with these random guys... still dont know where they took us. It was a long ride, we switched cars, etc...Went to strip club, got into a huge fight (my best friend at the time had a drinking and rage problem).
I know more shit went down, but it's so hard to remember... that was a BAD month. Showing up to work still drunk, puking in between customers, having sex in public, flashing people, etc... I was drunk more than not :/ mania + alcoholism = bad