You used the word "crutch" and I think that's very apt. If we have a broken leg we use a crutch to help support us as we heal. Same with meds. I've used lithium for 34 years now. It keeps me out of mania, out of jail and out of hospital. That's a good thing and has contributed to my joy of life. Even help with basic functioning is a plus. I understand your thinking but don't be sad, be glad for whatever help you can get.

At best l can last a year meds free then my life implodes but if l ever needed to go meds free again l may only have a day or a month of stability before l crash and burn l can't take the risk so I endure the side effects to have a better life.

I hope l'm around when the cure is found stability for always...yes please, the side effects make me sad not the meds, the fact l have bipolar makes me sadder

I learned 4yrs ago that without my lithium I would be inpaitent for life at the rate I was going. I had been off it for 10 yrs while the docs played with other ms meds and in and out of hospitals every 3 or so mths.
The switch back to lith was because of returning to a old pdoc who was a very educated man who read a artical on the lith/lamicatal protocol for bipolar. Yes it makes me sad to have to be so dependent on meds only because that brings fear that someday I may not be able to get therm and Id be sick again.

yes i am totally dependent on meds and not ashamed to admit it (( hugs ))

I cannot function without my meds. It is what it is, so I am not letting it bother me.

funnily enough this was the topic I was discussing with my support worker today... about how being reliant on meds makes me feel like a loser.... I have stopped some meds 3 times now and all didn't turn out well (bit of an understatement).. so I have been hit in the face with it

ofc my support worker gave the same analogy which I'm sure we have all heard so often - that if I was diabetic would I feel weak for taking insulin? she just didn't get that it's not that easy... yes our brain lacks certain chemicals and we need meds to adjust that... but I do sometimes feel like I should have more willpower over it (crazy I know)

I think I have to accept a life of meds.... or I certainly will fall into the gutter and not be one who is looking at the stars

Yes I have the same exact problem except that my meds barely help me function as it is. With out them though I am practically a vegetable. All I can muster off them is sleeping.

And yes I've thought of a world ending scenario where I couldn't get my meds and just went right of the deep end. Lets just hope that never happens.

I am the same, totally dependent on my medication. It used to make me sad and I dreaded every morning having to go through the swallowing of a handful of pills routine. But now, I am thankful that I have the right meds to keep this illness under control. I think its great that we have them or I would be in and out of the hospital every few months as well. They definitely allow me to have a better life so don't be sad. If they are working, be glad that you have the right combo and that you can function with them. Big Hugs.

As a person who has been on meds and then just decided I didn't want to take them anymore due to -laziness, anger, frustration, don't want to have to take pills all my life- I understand completely. I would stop and then be ok for a little while and then down into the rabbit hole I would go. After 2 hospital stays and getting out of a bad situation I am ok with taking my meds. It is amazing how much better I am when taking meds consistently. Like day and night. It is not fun to think that you will have to do this everyday forever, but be glad that something is out there that will help make your life more manageable.

Yep totally dependant....thats just the way it is, cant fight, wont get me anywhere, so i just accept it.

It is what it is