Yup balling my eyes out.

Before you draw any conclusions about having children I would talk to your pdoc and look at the legitimate medical literature. There is always a chance that a child with two bipolar parents will be born with bipolar. But there is always a chance that the child will be born with the disorder even if the parents aren't bipolar. There is a tendency for the disorder to skip generations. Don't close all your doors until you do all the research. If I come across some articles I will forward them to you.

Thank you so much. It's not like I'm anywhere near ready to have a child yet, I'm only 21. But the fact is, I want to some day. I want to have a wonderful baby and give him or her the life I never had.

Gee if I honestly believed that way two of the most fantastic humans to walk this earth would never be here. My kids didnt ask to be born nor in truth did they ask to be concieved but they were. They come from a long line of DYSFUNCTIONALITY and on top of it ran a HUGE risk of inheriting not only the mental bullshit but a few choice physical diseases to boot. I never wanted kids but I dont regret my decision to bring them into this world. Yeah both are BP and the youngest is ADHD and has PTSD and is a cutter. They both have inherited the COPD bullshit and who knows what else they have gotten from me bt the point is we all take a big fucking risk coming into this world and seriously if every beeper decided against reproducing +50% of us on this board probably wouldnt be here. Is it easy raising a BP child no but then again raising any child is not a walk in the park. My kids have huge issues and even tho they are spoiled and self centered they are truly amazing human beings and I do honestly think the world is a better place for having them in it. Noone says you have to have kids but if you truly want them then don't let the decision not to have them be based solely on the chance that they may be born with what you have. You may just be depriving the world of the next Mozart or Einstein and even if your child is just that a child you may be depriving your own self of the best experience you will ever know

Just my opinion, but I would think you'd be better equipped to handle a child that had bipolar or adhd or ocd or whatever. You've been there, you understand. Would probably be less of a struggle IMHO. Not to say it would be smooth sailing, but more understanding.

Maybe its being a girl or just me. But every time I see a baby in a woman's arms, I yearn to be her. Same with seeing a pregnant woman, I feel empty inside when I seem them. I was born to have babies, I just know it. I'm just so scared. One because I don't want to bring a person into this world just so they can hurt like I have. And two, the man I'm with now is the man I want to he with forever. He treats me like a princess, he understands my moods, I love him with all of my heart. And if he doesn't want kids... what do I do?

To have or not have children is a personal choice that, as far as I'm concerned, is based on some very selfish attitudes. Passing on BP to children hardly counts to me. One of my children, with my first wife, has no signs of BP. Of my other two by wifey #2, one is BP and one is autistic. Oh, my step-daughter from #2s first marriage has problems. Not what I wanted but you gotta love 'em. You can look up the statistics (a single BP parent has a 30% chance of passing on BP, it goes up to 60% if both parents are BP). In my case, my Mother's family would have died out centuries ago if there were concerns about BP. As it is, here I am surrounded with aunts and uncles and cousins and doing a check against non-BPs I know my life hasn't been much different than theirs. Everybody has problems.

I think if two partners are meant to be together, they will want similar things in terms of their lifestyles, particularly with respect to kids.

I have learned this lesson the hard way through several relationships, but I think I will find someone who wants the same things I want.

If your current boyfriend does not want the same things, you will eventually find one who does. Trust me on this!!

Oh gonna play devils advocate here. As you say you are 21 I realize that 21 is an adult but you have alot of living to do and trust me here if you sell your soul and decide ok bf says he doesn't want kids and event tho I do then I wont because of what he desires you will live to regret it . . . There is no reason for you to have to give up your dreams for ANYONE

when i was told i had bp i was also told that i would never have anymore children....that was 5 years ago....and today i was told that it was possible...

i would not trade the little one that i already have for the world, but i also don't think i am going to have anymore....first of my man is the same way, he doesn't want any, not because hes BP or anything, but because he thinks hes to old and doesn't want to start over...

its completely possible to have little ones and function and be a good mom (or dad or parents) even with this disorder...just because you have this disease doesn't mean you cant or that you shouldn't have kids...your choice is yours and your partners....if kids are something you truly want, when you are ready go for it...

theres always the tons of children waiting to be adopted that would love to have you as a mom.

Thank you all for the kind responses. I may have my boyfriend read them. Tell him I'm not totally crazy in thinking that we can do it.

Bipolars are just as capable of loving their children as normal parents are. And at the end of the day, all a child needs to grow is the love of his/her parents.

Okay last night I stayed clear of the post because of my emotional state regarding this topic.

You are young and if kids is something you want in the future then you need to find the partner that is on the same page with you. DO NOT settle for thinking he is right and not get what you want out of life.

Because if you settle at 21, you maybe able to convince 21 year old you that you don't want kids and life is just going to be grand but 27 year old you is going HATE the 21 year old you.

If he is set on no kids then you need to make the decision of whether that is a deal breaker for you and if that is truly what you want, but I will be honest at 21 you don't know if it is or not.