Bipolar Disorder Support Group
Bipolar disorder is not just a single disorder, but a category of mood disorders marked by periods of abnormally high energy and euphoria, often accompanied by bouts of clinical depression. This is the place to talk about your experience with bipolar disorder, learn from others' experiences, and find support.
My adult stepson is a scum! He can't keep a job to save his life. as teen, he got 2 girls pregnant back to back. He doesn't get to see one. He suposed to have custody of the other child because the mother is a drug addict. This idiot is high school dropout and a low life. He always coming to dear ol' dad for money and other help. He is ruining our marriage. My dumb husband backs his rotten son up 100% and treats me like a servant. He has fucked up so many times, most other parents would of wash their hands of him years ago! I'm so angry about this, I could explode!
It is soo time that u take care of yourself n stop being a door mat.
Your husband is a enabler & a skilled abuser.
I feel bad for writing this but based on your post. you may be an codependant.
On DS: emotional physical support group.
read n post n ask question n share n learn n journal ...
Alan non may be helpful. Uncertain but I think that they touch on subject: codependance & effects that another has on us and community...
On DS: codependance support group. ask questions etc...
I personally would call police on step son when needed. I wouldn't give a rats ass what his teacher/dad say's. if u don't want to listen to abuser mouth. get in car n go for drive. go get your nails &/or hair done or go to woman shelter for your safety n peace. & to at least have a record. A record that could be use against the abuser.
if u r in US! anyone with child has it finacially made for 18 yrs on welfare system. housing, food assistance n wick & medicaid for child.
there is public tansportation. as in van service that transport people to n from medical appt's n hospital for a small fee or if person has medicaid, the transport is free.
being that abuser son is in his father bill fold, that means he is take ing your money.
Start n do this; every 2 wks go n have your nails done. don't ask or tell or threaten, just do it.
go once a mo, go have your hair trim after you get a hair style.Just do it.
example: go to mall 3 times a wk,to walk w/o shopping on Sat's, at set time, wkly
If u don't work. u might opt to get p-time job, oh lets say 2 dys wk..option, line up 1 to 2 house a wk to clean.
Late Sat evening, cook small Sunday dinner or make sandw..
Attend church on Sundays. make friends n socialize outside church. ya, adults from outside family can help u c n help u, through friendships, u will come to realize that it's not normal nor acceptable way of life that your in.
I'm just surmise ing that abuser may not want you to have outside friends to really talk too. friends that r not in an abusive relationship.
Create your own personal life. this gets you out of house n little money in Your pocket
I have a flower n veg garden & inside herb garden in small pots n kitchen window.
take up a hobby &/or do crafts. I sew n make flower arrangements that I sale at friends/neighborhood/church yard sales.
If my child thought that she/he could use n abuse n treat me like a door mat. I would turn child over to the stateto have/raise child. They will provide her/him an edu ( schooling ) n cloth n feed n house child n provide ulitys n rec. etc...
No adult is going to come into my home n abuse me. and if child treacher/dad backs up/enable his child or our child to do so. I would call peace offc to have the nut or nuts removed from my home.
Simply tell officer that you fear that your mate will have 1 sided arguement in your face n that more than likely it will escolate.
People will only treat us the way that we show them that they can or how we taught them to do so.
Does abuser also financially abuse you!
Again check out the mention support groups.
I said a prayer for you & I will keep you in my thoughts n prayers.
XXX's
You soo deserve to have self respect/dignity, & to build up your ego and to have peace & accept nothing less than respect from others.
Yes. When a parent has a deep attatchment to a child, it can be difficult to be rational. I am a bit like your husband in that I don't face my own children's problems well. BUT SOMETIMES tough love is NEEDED and in this case, it is needed.
Maybe the step son could get on disability and eventually be independent.
For the time being, police interventions, drug rehab and tough behavioral restraints and or a case worker might be appropriate. Hopefully, if another entity like mental health of Catholic Charities can intervene, then perhaps he can lead a decent life and you can have him over for Christmas dinner but he can function outside the house-you know?
Of cours,e I am being highly idealistic. If it gets to a point where the step son will not listen and his financial stuff keeps getting worse, you might have to leave him out in the cold. HOWEVER before that time, I would sit down and talk with the step son and husband and tell them what your plans are and formulate some rules (with hubby) and be tough because there comes a time when the indigent (and I AM A REFORMING INDIGENT) cannot rely on family or friends for taking care of them.
He may have to reach bottom-I dont' know. I DO KNOW that for some adults, funciton can be difficult, but that adult has to ask for help and WANT to make his or her life better.
Good luck. You sound like a person of integrity who is ready to get things done. I applaud you.
Achala