I am so sorry you are having this situation with your "friend" (I out it in inverted commas because he really can't be a true friend if he treats you this way!). Honestly, I can relate. I am BP and also have an autonomic disorder and a connective tissue disorder which are disabilities that aren't visually apparent. I have had this sort of thing most of my life. The only advice I can give is try to show him some information about bipolar? Or write him a letter/email telling him how he is making you feel and your experiences? The only other option that unfrotunately I have had to take is to walk away from the friendship. This may be really hard, but if he is causing more stress than he is supporting you, he isn't worth it.

*Unfortunately

Oh, I think once they start sharing their thoughts and opinions with me about what a 'leech' I am, they cease being my friends.

A friend doesn't constantly degrade you.

I have a very good friend and she's 100% sure that I could successfully do and hold any job out there!!!!

I come across pretty well, so I am used to people disagreeing with me when I tell them how ill I am!!!

But they don't do it in a dismissive, denigrating way.
It's more of a back-handed compliment.
They assure me I seem so NORMAL!!

Now, my good friend might consider me a leach.
But if she does, she has the good grace not to share that little fact with me!!!

If you want to keep having a relationship with this guy (I really hesitate to call it a friendship), why don't you tell him you know how he feels and what he thinks about this topic and that you don't want to discuss it or hear about it anymore.

If he'll at least respect that request and that's enough for you, perhaps that can just be one of those things that the two of you agree to disagree about and not touch on it anymore.

If he won't do it or says he will but then doesn't anyway, then I guess there's nothing much else to say to him except for -- 'You think I'm a leech and I think you're an asshole. Let's just leave it at that.'

It IS sad when someone's ignorance causes them to treat you cruelly and gets in the way of what you'd like to be a close friendship.
But sometimes, we just have to accept the sad truth, remove ourselves from the abuse and only have those people in our lives who respect us.

I'm sorry that your (maybe) friend is being a jerk about this.

(((((Hugs)))))

This person is not a friend... Friends should be happy you are functional and lend a hand when you're not. Don't keep anyone in your circle who isn't supportive and encouraging. I know that is easier said than done some times... but be picky of the people you surround yourself with and you will fell better for it.

I don't think a good friend would accuse you of being a leach. Hell we all have out better functioning days, even I feel like I could go back to work at times.....but I am usually on the "up" side and not thinking rationally!!!!

I wouldn't do much explaining to your friend....you know better than anyone what you are capable of. Just doesn't sound like much of a friend to me nickpc. Some people have no clue as to what another person goes thru!!

That friend of yours sounds like he's got his own issues he hasn't dealt with. Drop him because he's definitely toxic.

Keeping yourself emotionally stable is not leaching off of the government. Tell this asshole to F*******!

thanks for the advice everyone...

He sounds like a jerk. screw him. That's why I him to mind his own business about your disability. I am learning not to tell anyone anymore. There is a stigma attached to this BP crap. Not our damn fault we got this.

I would definitely drop him...he doesn't sound like much of a friend. It is probably the medication and whatever else you do to cope that makes you come across so well, it is great that you have that, but my son had the same problem before he got on disability for bipolar, he would get a job work a bit and then end up back in the hospital. You are no leaching and you deserve to have help as much as anyone else. Tell your friend how things are but if he continues to degrade you, you don't need that negativity in your life!!

I have lots of friends who I think respect me alot until my mood swings. 3 yrs ago I had a psychotic break and was in hospital for 2 weeks, when I got out and tried to get back my life to where it left off, every single person I knew except 2 didn't get why I was still a big mess, it took me over a year to get over that episode.

People think well now your out and your doing things so why are you not getting it together, they don't get it that getting over an episode can take weeks months or years! Geeeezzzz just thinking about what I went through, and out of that I did lose a close friend. Very sad. I have learned though not to concern myself with how anyone will react around me.

Yes. I Totally get it. And there's just no easy answer, is there?

Huggggggggggggggggggggs, nickpc - you're an alien. Aren't you glad this is the perfect site for alien venting....and Support.

:)