Bereavement Support Group

Are you grieving the loss of a loved one? Whether you lost someone recently or it's been years, grief and its accompanying emotions can be complicated to cope with. Join our online support group to connect with a supportive group of people who really know how you feel. Help is right here.

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Death & Dying
/ Bereavement Support Group

Too much grief and not enough support...

rose3
rose3
I didn't think I'd have to be talking about this now...a year after my father's death. But in all truth, maybe it's that it's been too many deaths and challenges thats hitting me.

In the past 4 years, my grandfather (who I was close to) died, then my only close uncle, then mother, dog of 12 1/2 years, a puppy after that...and if that wasn't already enough...my father who was my biggest supporter and best friend. His death has hit me the hardest. It was a week before xmas last year, yet feels like yesterday.

I know it would be easier for me if I were in a relationship or had other family support, but I have none of that. I'm a single mom of a 5 year old who's with me 24/7. The friends I have are other moms who seem to busy in their lives to have the time.

I don't think I've ever felt so lonely and isolated about how I feel before.

I read a poem tonight that read something about "my world stopped when you were gone..." And I realized this is how I felt about the loss of my father.

I know what I need (support of friends, family and/or therapist). But it's hard to do when you feel stripped away or limited with of all of this.

So I'm back to DS, in hopes of getting stronger again...
deleted_user
deleted_user
Welcome back. I'm new to this group too. We'll both make it through. I totally get your situation --that's too many deaths in a short amount of time. This past year I wore the same dress to five funerals, the last one being my sister's just two weeks ago. Just know you're not alone.
deleted_user
deleted_user
A year is no time at all. I'm closing in on the first anniversary also. It could be yesterday, last week, last month. I know one thing about learning: adrenaline accelerates learning. This is part of the fight/flight mechanism, it is part of succeeding in life. Something awful and painful, something that touches us where we live -- in our hearts -- is larger than life and feels as if it actually makes grooves in our brains. That's why it's so much easier to remember "bad" things than good things. It's good that you came back! There's a lot of support on DS. You're feeling normal things and the saddest part is that so many other people in your life don't understand, or don't want to think about it and don't want to talk about it. That's what therapists are for. Without my two therapists, where would I be now? A coffin or a psych ward. You're not alone, we're all here. All you have to do is journal or post. Someone will always answer. Your father is not gone, death is not the end. Watch and listen: there will be signs of his presence, I guaranty it. I've had them and everyone I know who has lost someone dear to them as had them. God bless you.
rose3
rose3
Thank you Gejordan and Ellzeena. It helps to communicate with people who have been there... All the best to you both as well.
deleted_user
deleted_user
so sorry for your lose I to understand ...my son, then a nephew...then a friend then a uncal an then my bro all from 2003 to 2008 an I have no one but I have to be everything to everybody eles...this is the only place that I can be me an be real about how I feel...so know your not alone an Ill always listen cause sometimes thats whaat we really need...candeda
rose3
rose3
Thanks Candeda.

I feel the same way about this being the only place where is feels like real communicating about how I feel, and feeling genuinely heard. (I used to feel that with my father though...)

You obviously get the multiple losses, having experienced so many yourself too... I'm sorry for what you've gone through as well. Having no one and having to be there for everyone else...sounds too familiar!

Thanks for your response. And I'm here anytime for you too.

I wish you all the best.

Rose