Bereavement Support Group
Are you grieving the loss of a loved one? Whether you lost someone recently or it's been years, grief and its accompanying emotions can be complicated to cope with. Join our online support group to connect with a supportive group of people who really know how you feel. Help is right here.
It's been up and down emotionally.. I couldnt get out of bed.. I couldnt sleep.. I just dont want to do this anymore. My life went from absolutely perfect with the best boyfriend ever to painful in a matter of hours after the accident. Everything just seems so purposeless without him. Its been over a month and a half and I feel like the feelings are just getting worse. My heart is constantly heavy.. Trying to hold it together at work is difficult. My birthday is next week and I just feel so lost. We were supposed to leave for vacation today. I just cant seem to hold it together anymore. I am just going through the motions, trying to pretend to be ok.. Im not. I lay in bed and cry all day until I have to get up and go to work. My roommates planned a trip to get away for the weekend and I cancelled because I just cant fathom pretending to have fun. I feel so guilty and I miss him so much. This is so unfair.
The best support that anyone can offer is to serve you while you make occasional visits and by posting on this message board, and people really do have a ready supply of love and understanding. Stay nearby. You need to reminded that you have value, especially now. I really appreciate that you are writing and opening up to sharing your thoughts and those wavering emotions. Though you are going to have to use the knowledgeable of useful resources available for coping with the loss of your beloved one. And this is so that you may understand what's happening inside your own mind and you may communicate your thoughts in a step-by step plan of actions. Supporters need to know that you are taking a proactive approach to getting better. And the only way to assure practical help is by you taking an active role to breaking down these walls of shame and those troubling feeling and thoughts of guilt all of which has to be addressed in a detailed self-plan to help you begin with a good effort to processing your grief. All supporters desire is for you to have better control of your feelings.
I am leaving you with a link, of which this read may help you to better focus and understand how important it is to identify what you are thinking and feeling at present. This article is a good resource to offer professional advice. After reading, please come back to this post and let this group know how this article has helped you to better understand what you are experiencing. The idea is that seeing your progress motivates supporters to cheer you on, dear one. You will soon be feeling much better if you stay in touch with helpful and insightful goals. Make your very own list of goals as well; this helps.
Read here, kurt: https://www.sharecare.com/health/grief-emotional-health/article/coping-with-grief
I found a very interesting book as well: "THE LOSS OF A LIFE PARTNER"
by Carolyn Ambler Walter
6 weeks is quite some time, but not nearly long enough to process it all.
I found that a real life bereavement class really helped me go through the loss of my father. (My sister and my mother had passed previously, and dad represented the last of the family I was born into.)
There are various stages of grief that we go through. I have learned that we do not go through them in a set order, and just because we think we have resolved a stage does not mean it will come back to bother us. Given that, I prefer to think of them as the emotions of grief.
As with other emotions in life, each emotion has 'triggers' things that bring out the emotion. It is my belief that we manage the triggers as well as the emotions. For example, sadness may be triggered by things that remind you of him. It could be specific songs, places you used to go, things that he said. We may get a handle on those songs, but then out of the blue months later a similar song may hit you really hard.
That is not regressing, it is just triggers coming back. We learned to deal with them before, and we can keep doing it!
Again, welcome to our group, and I am very sorry for the reason that brought you here to us but glad to meet you
I have 2 daughters and one is away at camp this summer for 7 weeks. She left less than a month after her father died. My youngest and I went to go see her this past weekend and it was nice to get a peaceful sleep and be with the two people who have lost as much as me. It was a lovely weekend with love and fun. I can say that it was a beautiful weekend. When I came home the next day I had a really hard day because I would usually have spoken to my husband about what we did and enjoy the adventures we had. However he was not there. Then I had guilt because of having a good weekend. Why am I telling you this? I am telling you this because I realized something.
Even though I had a great weekend with my girls and did not dwell on what my reality was. It was something that I needed and it was something he would have wanted me to do. Even though it is hard to get through the days and all I want to do is cry at times. I know that he would want me to enjoy our children and friends no matter what. They have always been there, and they always will be. Learn to accept the help and distractions even if for a short time. Because it is in those times we can find our true strength.,
Welcome to the group and take the time you need. There is no book on this stuff and no set guide lines. Just be you and the best You, that you can be today.