I am so very sorry for your loss. I've lost a sister, parents and grandparents. I can only imagine how you feel and what you must be going through.

By all means, take time to process things.

I really do not like the phase of loss thing; it sort of makes me think that I have messed up if I feel the same "phase" again. I have found that calling it the emotions of grief works for me. Emotions can be triggered my many things, so if I feel the same emotion "long after I thought I had dealt with it", I can usually assume that it comes from a different trigger. Please, don't beat yourself up for progressing too slowly.

There is no single bereavement program that will work for everybody. Instead listen to what people here say; take what works and leave the rest.

There is also a widows and widowers group here. Some people join it quickly, others wait until they have dealt with the loss a bit more. There are some wonderful CLs there (Community Leaders, we are basically user moderators.) They can help you assimilate into the group, and find out how to best use their group as you deal with all the emotions that face you.

Again, I am so very sorry for your loss.

Thank you

Huge hug for you and a blessing... I am so very sorry for your loss.... xo

I am so sorry for your loss and your grief. I lost my husband a year ago and still cannot cope. We were together for 56 years and he was my heart, soul and life. I go on each day in a daze and do my best to move forward.

I know what you are going through. I lost my soul mate on August 1, 2016. He died of cancer. We only knew his cancer for about 1 month and 1/2. He passed away in my home with me. So if you like to talk to someone maybe we can exchange number.

I feel similar only the my grandma was not my soulmate but my best friend.

So sorry for your loss. It's still so new and I'm sure you're still numb with grief and shock. My husband was diagnosed with cancer and passed away almost 2 years from the date of diagnosis. Even though his prognosis was very poor, I never believed he would pass away, he was such a strong man I was his biggest cheerleader and constant advocate. When he actually died, I went numb. The first year was horrible, just going through the motions of living. Somehow, over time, you find yourself crying less and becoming interested and re-engaged in life. It takes time and you can only take one day at a time, my mantra was let me get through this minute right now and so on.
Good luck to you...

There is a really wonderful group on here for people who have lost their life partner... The Widow and Widowers Group

https://www.dailystrength.org/group/widows-widowers

I'm sorry for your loss and know the devastation that consumes our life without them. I am Sharon, one of the Community leaders in the Widow and widower so group. I lost my husband and my life as I knew it and also our plans for the future. Having others who understand the importance of that personally was a huge factor in the days ahead. My story is on the Widow and Widower page. I send my prayers and support to you. Sharon

I have lost many people in my life and the one thing I know is the longer you sit the fatter you get..I know I've been doing it for a good 3 years and I've gained weight etc.... so i looked in the mirror today and thought that it I'm going to try my best to get out of this funk and I don't mean to sound like a know it all many many councilors are terrific, and if this exercise doesn't help me want to drag my fat butt out of bed then I am going in the next month,

Thank you all for your kind words.
It's 17weeks today that my husband lost his fight and I can relate to a lot of what has been said.
I have just started counselling at my local hospice, it is all done by volunteers. I am not sure yet, but I must give it a go.
I think I am alienating myself from family and friends because I tell them that I miss him so much. I explain that if I had an accident and lost all my limbs, they wouldn't tell me that it would get better, but they would help me to learn to adapt. I've lost my limbs, they just can't see it.
Thank you for the support and I will look at the widow's page.
Gail

Hi Gail, I don't know your pain, I do know the horrid journey which cancer brings. Being a survivor of cancer, many did not understand My Feelings. From your perspective, I can only ask that You Honor Your Feelings and Feel Them. If people don't 'get it' seek those who do validate your need to speak and to work through the fog. My fog lasted nearly 2 yrs with my sister, my Dear Mother and brother, more 1year...there is No time frame, and the waves of grief will come and go...it' a matter to ride them out. I sincerely wish you well with hospice therapy. The woman who worked with my sister(35) were wonderful. I used the book "On Death and Dying" to help me better understand the death and moods of my loved ones, and I found the same stages of grief, in what ever order they come to be helpful to my healing. ML

I can understand completely. When my sweet, loving brother succumbed to cancer, it hollowed me out to the core. It's amazing I myself haven't physically died and am still sane. It took a long time, 3 years, to muster up some feeling of love for something or someone again.