I'm so sorry for your loss! Although our nature of losses are different, I can feel the pain of sudden loss.

My mom passed away suddenly, alone at home on February 2. No goodbye, no last kiss. She was brain dead when we found her and at the ER, I had to sign and let her go. Everything happened before I could even understand the devastating effect. I was angry at everyone, everything at the start. Went to her private bathroom, grabbed a bat and started hitting the tiles, door, anything and everything which was dear to her. I screamed for days, wouldn't stop for a moment. This continued for at least 7 days. Then I calmed down on my own.
Crying seems to be my normal routine now and I feel I don't belong anywhere.

I guess what I'm trying to say is, most of us know what you're going through. There's nothing wrong with feeling the way you do. You've lost the love of your life. Of course you'll mourn your loss. Waiting for that familiar voice to call your name, feeling like a zombie, feeling lost, angry, lonely, guilty..these are all very natural at this stage. All of us are going through the same emotions. Please don't feel embarrassed about your emotions, you're crying because you love your husband, there's nothing wrong with it.
As I mentioned once in another post, our loved ones are not like a sore tooth that we put salt water and the pain goes away. This pain is here to stay, it's our love and the only proof we're missing them.

Somewhere down the line, the intense pain will go away and we will be back on the boat called life. I wish you peace of mind.

I know almost exactly what you are feeling. I say almost because I didnt have as much time with my true love as you did yours. We only had two and a half years together before she passed away without any warning at all in her sleep. This was Feb.7th of this year. I guess our time was short but the love was still so very strong and healthy.
Its been a crushingly heavy time for me every night since. I also am crying all through the night, aching for her to return and knowing she can not. Its so very hard.
I can only offer you empathy because I honestly do not know how to help. Im sorry this is happening to you.

Remember, in the Bible it says that the husband and wife become one. You and your husband had that oneness together and this is why you feel the pain and sense of loss that you do. Part of your life passed with him but, you still have to go on in life until you have fulfilled your role in this pathway we call life. It is not easy, it doesn't always seem fair, and it doesn't always make sense either. My heart and prayers go out to you.

I am so sorry for your loss - I can totally relate to what you are feeling. My husband died one week ago today (March 7, 2010) - my family have all left and gone back to their respective homes and lives. I feel that my life has come to an end with my beloved, Owen. This is the second husband that I have buried and I am, like you, devastated but know that in time will help me heal. I, too, have every emotion going on - it just does not seem fair - time heals. Right now I am raw and hoping that having a bad day today, that tomorrow will be a little better. Here is hoping - keep the faith and keep writing here - it helps.

You will find the support and help you need here on this site...it has been a godsend for me since I lost my husband in Nov. due to liver cancer. This has been the most difficult time in my life and the people here that have lost a spouse have been so helpful in making me realize my feelings and thoughts are not so different from theirs...alos join the Widows and Widowers support group....

Grief is very hard to cope with! I am so sorry for your los... (hugs) Kristine

Thank you so much for thinking of me and caring about me. I hope knowing you are all in my thoughts and prayers helps you in some small way.

I also can relate to you except I lost my mother suddenly on November 12 2009 I spoke to her from work at 10:45 and found her dead and lips and nostrils turning blue on the floor at 4:00clock that same day. I also feel like she died right after I spoke with her on the phone. No clue, no warning she wasn't sick and quite young 76 in this day and age. She wanted to be cremated so I did that for her of course I respected her wishes. It struck me when someone said they went in there mom's bathroom and smashed everything near and dear to her. I felt like throwing her urn clear accross the room when I received her ashes. I felt so ashamed even thinking that but I felt like my mother was just wiped off the face of the earth when she was cremated like she never existed. I miss her terribly and we had a great relationship. I have no regrets there but I have to tell you her quick passing gives new life to the saying here today gone tomorrow. I love and miss my deAR SWEET mother very much!

I can say I understand how you feel. On March 6, 09 on my 39th anniversary the doctor called me and told me my husband had stage 4 lung cancer. He passed May 5, its been a hard journey but I was doing better until March came now I think of him constantly feels like it just happened yesterday when I really thought it was getting easier.
I don't want to make it worse for family members I am sure they is remembering to so I just don't talk it. Prayer and crying helps me.