this column will be a bit clumsky and Brad and I have been together for almost 13 years..but this year..we were separated for at least 3 months and I had to take care of the house alone.My friend Sophie is 62 and recently lost her husband..They were not getting along too good and they were on the verge of a divorce.When he died..she discovered that he was zillions in debt.He owed this and he owed that and the poor thing doesnt know what to do.Last month..she read about a dance for people who recently lost their spouses..Since she doesnt know the neighborhood well..i went with her and I am wondering how some people are breathing.The dance was in a real fancy place and when I walked in there..little me knew that this wasnt good to be good for me.There was an open bar and the soft drinks were also included.The buffet was fabulous..and we sat at a table and guess what? Noone spoke to us! Why do men always sit at tables and do not speak? Are men afraid of women? Next to me sat a red haired woman who didnt utter a word to us all night.We sat there for at least 45 minutes.noone approached us.Why? Is it because the way we were dressed?Then after we were there for one hour..2 men came over.They were friends..I guess and they asked us to dance.Even before he asked me my name..he looked at me and sophie and asked"How much money do you have in the bank?" Now why would this dude ask such a question? Sophie just lost her husband and the money that she got wasnt much..I answered and told him..i am on disability and I dont get much..he replied"oh".What kind of reply is oh? What did this guy want? My late grandfather always told me when a man asks about money it means that he is having some kind of problem and when this dude asked me this..I knew that I would rather be listening to the late George Carlins..famous seven words..when I replied..he went to another table.He must have asked 5 different women and everyone of them told him this to mind his own business.He did not get anyone to dance.Can you blame us ladies? His friend had on a baseball cap and on him he looked like he was trying to be Pete Rose.His friend looked at me and sophie and asked"What kind of car do you ladies drive?"
After these questions and crying in the ladies room..I decided this.Brad aint so bad.These men to me are really having problems and I did not want to even talk to some of them.Sophie came into the ladies room and she was crying."Vader.I am so sorry.I didnt know.But how does a woman in her mid 50-60s get these friends? Where do we go,Vader..These guys are losers.where are all of these people and how can we meet new people if we dont like the things that they do.?" I told sophie..i dont know but at 61...I aint looking for an affair cause I dont have the money or the looks like Angelina Jolie nor do I have Janet Jacksons figure..I am a plain woman and maybe this is one of the reasons why men have never married me.Men dont want plain women anymore..they want someone who looks like Dolly Parton and has got a lot of money..But this dance was another disaster and this is our second time that we went there and these are the same questions also..Why are men so afraid to talk? Why cant a man talk about the election of Obama or what will happen in 2009? Why do men always want to talk about hunting,fishing and canoing when we face an era of change? Cant people talk anymore?
And how does a woman like me who is 61 meet these people? My therapist told me that I am not trying harder..but if these are the men he wants to see and be my friend..I would rather stay home and watch CSI -Miami with David Caruso and if I had the money..I would like to go on a date with Axl Rose...