Bereavement Support Group

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Death & Dying
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How can I help now...he killed himself

vader
vader
How can I help her now? My elderly friend took his life.He was in his early 60s..so he was still young.He just retired from 35 yrd at Boeing.He had a sense of humour.Then something happened and he stopped talking to me.So Daily Strength...the 12 th step (or 9th step) of recovery...you ask for forgiveness if you have offended someone and I am asking all of you if I have offeneded you in
the past..I am extremely sorry.After he stopped talking to me and i have known him for 15 years..he stopped bathing.He stopped his mail.He gave away his cats...and he just stopped.He got a bottle of these sominex pills and got a bottle of vodka..he wrote the note and he told me and a few others...that he was bored and didnt want to live anymore...He told me that retirement sucks (it was just a few weeks)...he wasnt married and I vader did not recognize these signs? Can all of you forgive me? I am crying now.The service and memorial will be held at a later date.Today I am doing my laundry and he wanted me to give his picture of the cat away to the shelter..I will honor his request.And I failed him as a friend.But you see...Brad is in rehab and i have got a house...3 cats...we adopted that stray and right now...Brads health must improve.I still run the house and stuff.This Sunday...my beloved father would have been 93 and i am celebrating..my daddy loved the movies...so I am going to see the new Tom Hanks movie...and as a Catholic that grew up in the 1950s---this is only a movie and this is only a story...I cant get upset over this right now...my friends death just happened and i have to be strong.On June 7th...I see my brother who is flying in from New York for the graduation...I havent seen Stanley in 5 years...so this will be special.Stanley is taking me to a MAriners game.We are going to see The Minnesota twins..and remember baseball is a kids game.Thanks again and remember my apology for offense....vader and the cats...meow...
deleted_user
deleted_user
Vader,

This is Roger the Minister. Why didn't you tell me about this? I know you must have had a good reason and that is OK.
As you know my 18-year old son died in an accident. I know how you feel, I understand the pain.
God has been preparing me for DS since my son died. I am not the best your could find to talk about anything; but I would do my best with pray. I will pray that God will supply you with grace and mercy. An older man who had also lost his son told me that it will never get better bu it will get easier. And no you are not the blame. You cannot make people do what you want them to do. God Bless You In This Time Of Grief.

Roger the Minister - verse for you


1Th:4:13: But I would not have you to be ignorant, brethren, concerning them which are asleep, that ye sorrow not, even as others which have no hope.
1Th:4:14: For if we believe that Jesus died and rose again, even so them also which sleep in Jesus will God bring with him.
1Th:4:15: For this we say unto you by the word of the Lord, that we which are alive and remain unto the coming of the Lord shall not prevent them which are asleep.
1Th:4:16: For the Lord himself shall descend from heaven with a shout, with the voice of the archangel, and with the trump of God: and the dead in Christ shall rise first:
1Th:4:17: Then we which are alive and remain shall be caught up together with them in the clouds, to meet the Lord in the air: and so shall we ever be with the Lord.
Scott46
Scott46
I am sorry about your firend. So many of us define ourselves with our job/career. Its a traumatic transition when retirement comes around. No wife or [presumably] kids, makes it even harder. Prolly most of his friends were from work so those connections were broken or weakened. Sad. It was not your fault Vader.
deleted_user
deleted_user
I am so sorry to hear about your friend. Yes there may have been signs, but perhaps not strong enough signs to say that your friend would kill himself. It certainly showed that he was depressed, but lots of people get depression that don't kill themselves.

I lost a friend on January 3rd this year. Clark was my friend since I was 10 years old and I'm now 45. He was a close friend all through my life. No-one saw it coming. He had lots of friends and family to turn to, yet he decided to take his own life.

I only ask that God forgive him for what he's done, and that in that forgiveness he will accept Clark into heaven, and I can meet him there when my time is over.
vader
vader
to all who responded thank you at this time.It has been hectic and to me this was a big surprize.Things happen when you least at all expect it and I still am in shock.I still can figure out why he didnt tell me.I have got all
the numbers in seattle of people and places he can go..And I miss him.I really do.Thanks again to all..vader.
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