Shirley I will keep you all in my prayer and thoughts today. If you need someone to talk you I can give you my mobile number??. I am in Ireland remember. Let me know. I wish I could just give you a huge hug. I know remembering her hurts a lot right now but there will come a time when you will just sit and be glad to remember her and the impact she had on all your lives. Hang on in there xxxx Katie

birthdays, angel days and holidays are always the hardest for me. the lost of a child leaves this great big hole in your heart and it is slow healing and yes there are things that will rip it wide open again and again. but there will be days that you take comfort in the her memories. i am here if you need to talk. i will keep you and your family in my prayers. {{{{{hugs}}}}} jan

Birthdays are hard to get through. I am so sorry about Katelyn.

Besides my DH, I only have a few friends who would talk to me about Zachary. The other people I knew just didn't want to or couldn't talk about him, saying it upset them too much. Well, I tried to explain that it was good for me to talk about my son, that it was part of the healing process for me. Finally, I gave up.

To this day, my dad still won't talk about Zachary much. I gave up years ago trying to explain to him why I need to talk about my son. Of course with my dad, he's mostly just interested in talking about himself. It just makes me sad, because Zachary was his only grandson and I am his only child. But, what can you do?

i am so sorry for ur loss, i will keep u in my prayers, i wish i knew some words to take away the pain but i don't. but i can & will pray for u.

Hi Shirley,
I read your post this morning and hope your day was okay-- sometimes about all we can ask is to get through it. I remember that silence after my son died...there was one morning in church I just wanted to stand up and shout, "He was here! Don't you remember him? You were the people who stood up when he was dedicated and said you'd stand by him! Don't you even remember his name?" I only said something to the usher, a kind man who immediately said that he was happy I'd said something because he'd been afraid to say anything. It's hard to be mad then--but also hard to understand--should we wear a sign that says "say my child's name!"

REMEMBERING
by Elizabeth Dent

Go ahead and mention my child.
The one that died, you know.
Don't worry about hurting me further.
The depth of my pain doesn't show.
Don't worry about making me cry.
I'm already crying inside.
Help me to heal by releasing
The tears that I try to hide.
I'm hurt when you just keep silent,
Pretending he didn't exist.
I'd rather you mention my child,
Knowing that he has been missed.
You asked me how I was doing.
I say "pretty good" or "fine".
But healing is something ongoing.
I feel it will take a lifetime.

Here's a poem in memory of Katelyn. I am positive she's not forgotten, but like the people of my church, your friends don't know what to say and don't realize that simply the mention of her name would be so comforting. If you're interested, I put out a free monthly newsletter for bereaved parents. You can email me your postal address via my website if you'd like to receive it.
www.brokenheartslivinghope.com Take care, God bless.