Bereavement Support Group
Are you grieving the loss of a loved one? Whether you lost someone recently or it's been years, grief and its accompanying emotions can be complicated to cope with. Join our online support group to connect with a supportive group of people who really know how you feel. Help is right here.
I've joined this community today because I was looking for a grief group session in my neighborhood but could not find one that met outside of my work time.
My grief is getting worse insead of better as time goes on. Back in May (on my wedding anniversary) my father, after being hospitalized for nearly 3 months, passed away after the hospital put him through a multitude of horrors. I believe they ultimately killed him before his time was up, due to their carelessness and one medical problem on top of another.
A few days before my father passed away, a cousin of mine in her mid 40's passed away and a week after my father's funeral, another cousin, also in her 40's, passed away from a massive coronary and a stroke.
As if this was not enough, during the time my father was in the hospital, my baby brother (49 years old) collapsed in my fathers hospital room and was diagnosed with stage 4 brain cancer and had surgery the following day. He died 3 and a half months later, on July 30, 2009. I watched him slowly wither away.
I miss my father and brother so much, but also find myself feeling scared that I could be next. I feel physically ill, I hurt every where and I am unable to sleep much. Anyway, as I said, I thought I was supposed to start feeling better as time went on, but this does not appear to be what is happening, at least not so far for me.
I think I could feel better if I could cry more, but I think I'm supposed to be at the stage where I should have moved on by now, at least in everyone else's eyes. I've always had to be so strong and well, I just don't feel very strong right now.
My grief is getting worse insead of better as time goes on. Back in May (on my wedding anniversary) my father, after being hospitalized for nearly 3 months, passed away after the hospital put him through a multitude of horrors. I believe they ultimately killed him before his time was up, due to their carelessness and one medical problem on top of another.
A few days before my father passed away, a cousin of mine in her mid 40's passed away and a week after my father's funeral, another cousin, also in her 40's, passed away from a massive coronary and a stroke.
As if this was not enough, during the time my father was in the hospital, my baby brother (49 years old) collapsed in my fathers hospital room and was diagnosed with stage 4 brain cancer and had surgery the following day. He died 3 and a half months later, on July 30, 2009. I watched him slowly wither away.
I miss my father and brother so much, but also find myself feeling scared that I could be next. I feel physically ill, I hurt every where and I am unable to sleep much. Anyway, as I said, I thought I was supposed to start feeling better as time went on, but this does not appear to be what is happening, at least not so far for me.
I think I could feel better if I could cry more, but I think I'm supposed to be at the stage where I should have moved on by now, at least in everyone else's eyes. I've always had to be so strong and well, I just don't feel very strong right now.
If you haven't sought the services of a grief counselor, I would highly recommend doing so....usually you can meet with them outside of work hours and you need to find ways to process all of this. People who have not been through what you have been through can't understand, and they will often say insensitive and even stupid things -- whether or not they are trying to "help". Cry when you can -- it helps the pain to ease -- believe me, I know. The shower is a great place to cry, and a lot of people cry in the car though of course you have to be careful driving! But at least you will not be subject to criticism for it when you're alone.
Thinking of you and wishing you peace. Please allow yourself to grieve. (((HUGS)))
Its been 4 months and for me, when the times are bad they are realy bad.
What i mean is that its a complex process, as others have mentioned, there is no way to predict nor prevent what you are going to feel along the way.
sometimes i am angry, sometimes i miss my sister so bad i ask God why did he have to take the most important person for me, away from me.
some days are brighter too. so, theres no time frame really. i suspect that the ones who think we should have been over such event, is because they have no first hand experience.
Now i see clearly the meaning of life and the real meaning of losing someone.
With time you will see some things more clear, others not so much, but its part of the process.
we are here for you, so that you can write/express whatever is on your mind.
and, at the end, it feels good to vent.
Yesterday was a very bad day for me. I was at work, having lunch in my car, spent the entire lunch crying and could not pull myself back together to go back into my office. I had to call my boss and leave him a message that I would be leaving for the rest of the day.
I also called in sick today. It's a real struggle putting one foot in front of the other each day, but I do know that I have to do it. I have many reasons to want to do this. I have two beautiful grand children (girl and a boy), a beautiful daughter, son in law, a husband, a brother and a sister and my mother is still with me. Many, people to still be thankful for.
Anyway, wishing you all (and me) happy thoughts for the future.