Hi angel

I am not really sure about that I lost My dad and mom whom I really love and i did not feel that way at six months, I mean I did not feel as raw and vulnerable as I do now, with hubby..yes mothers day and fathers day came and went and I thought of them wishing they were here a slight sadness but that was it. going into a store and seeing gifts for mom and dad made me sad but not depressed. I guess it was my faith that got me through that. Losing my husband three weeks ago is different though. I am having a hard time with it sleepless nights lack of appetite the works. My faith tells me that I will not feel as raw as I do now. I want to go on living in the future when I am over this I want to see my kids and grandchildrfen grow, although I am not much company for them now. I want to live and go on deep down inside, I have to I have no choice. I know that my hubby would want me to get a life. He would never ever want to see me suffer.. that does not in anyway ease the pain now but in the 6 months I know I will heal with Gods love. There is a passage in the bible ."when all else forsakes thee I shall lift thee up" I am countinmg on Gods word. my mom my dad and now my husband I know God will help me heal
I hope writing this has helped you in some small way

God Bless you and comfort you my dear

((big hugs))

We're all different...
It also depends a lot on the circumstances...

Some people have problems at first and then things gradually get better for them and they develope a tolerance for what has happened..an acceptance....the ability to "move on'..while some people never can..and of course between those two extremes there are all kinds of variations...

Of course I belong in the never can category...

Obviously you have a counsellor so that is amove in the right direction for you..if you have supportive family and friends that can help as well.

Can it get better..yes..will it..probably in time...will you ever feel as you did before..probably not..to what degree you can remake your life depends alot on you...like it did me...when I went through my losses...

Good luck friend...

6months ago I lost my nanny..it hasnt got better..I wacthed a body be taken out of the old age home i work in(in a body bag)
it was sad as always..then i saw two little girl 8 and 12 maybe leaning into there mother crying..i could hear then(i was inside) all i could think of as i know how that feels those poor little girls so younge and that was there nanny..so i ended up balling my eye out at work..thankful no one saw my break down..it hurt i miss her more i think..so many things i use to do with her I have done now with out her..play,lunch,sitting alone at our famliy bar thinking if nanny was here i would have someone to sit with...im not very helping am i..i guess cuz im lost too..hey maybe if i go to a grif consler he'll realize that my bipolar also adds me to not copeing well and i'll get a p-doc ..theres an up side

I'm sorry about your loss. It is good you are getting counseling. Might consider a bereavement group as well. Grief is serious stuff and does not just go away with time. I have read that, yes, 4-7 months is the common range for setbacks. Not everyone has them. Its a personal rollercoaster ride. 2 steps forward and sometimes 2 or more steps back. Over the long haul you'll make slow progress. Since you are interested in how it goes for others, there is a very good book on grief that helped me. Author is Therese Rando. Check Amazon. God bless. Scott

I am sorry for your loss, your question is one I have asked myself many times. I lost my son in January, he was 29 years old and my youngest child. I personally do not believe that any two people will grieve the same way or within the same time frame. Too many variables are at play to generalize the process. But, there are many, many feelings we all have in common.
What to expect, I think it hinges on our beliefs about death. Is it a rebirth into the most Glorious Sacred world? If it is, then I would not deny any soul the right to choose when to go home. Some stay here 100 years, some leave even before they are born, we will leave too, when it is right. I expect a glorious reunion with my son in God's time, I expect to always remember my boy as the precious gift we was to me in this lifetime. Whatever comes through me is for my highest good, emotion is energy, we heal when we let that energy move. We are unto ourselves an integral part of All That Is.
The short time we are here will dissolve into eternity soon enough.
Try to expect a miracle, for we do indeed have the power to create one. Wishing you peace and serenity, Rebecca

Thanks to all of you for your replies. I can't imagine the sadness being any more raw than it is right now. You've all enlightened me by sharing your stories.

The pain of the loss of a loved one never really goes away. But in time, you'll start to feel better. Cherish each memory. I lost my brother in 2003 to suicide and at that time I felt as if the pain and hurt would never leave, like I could never move on. But eventually, you will heal. I'll tell you what helped me~remember all the good times and be thankful that you had them in your life. Trust me, I know it's hard, and you're going to feel as if the pain will never end, but believe me, you'll be better. Time does heal, they just don't tell you how much time. Take care and I'm sorry for your loss.