The anniversaries relating to my mum were fine because as a family we came together so in a strange way they were nice.
Just had anniversary of dad's death , was horrendous, was very low but feel I had to go through it and am feeling better the other side of it. The lead up was worse than the actual day.
My worst one is we buried my sister on my little boy's birthday.

I would say to you to pray for comfort on that day.
Even though in a sense is just another day, it really isn't. You are likely to face memories of what took place the year before.
Doing a sort of memorial type thing might help some.
Talking to others about what you are feeling is the best way to heal and makes one learn to cope better...

I've been widowed twice, but that doesn't make it any easier. I found that spending the anniversary date with supportive friends and family is probably the best. Then you are free to share your memories, and cry and hug and whatever you need to do. Don't be alone on that day!

I've been widowed twice, but that doesn't make it any easier. I found that spending the anniversary date with supportive friends and family is probably the best. Then you are free to share your memories, and cry and hug and whatever you need to do. Don't be alone on that day!

I just went through 1 year milestone of my daughters passing. It was not easy, it seems people on that day either stay the hell away from you or they are completely up your rear end. I went and did something that day the my daughter would be happy about. As dumb as it sounds, I went and bought a Starbucks and then proceeded to "talk" to her about it. We loved to go and get our latte's and BS for a while. You will get through it, stay strong and have faith. But doing something that day that the two of you enjoyed doing will help.

Right before the 1 yr anniversary of my brother's death, there were several people in my family who started to experience the same thing that I was going thru (anxiety attacks, sleeplesness,crying spells, etc). On the actual day of his anniversary, we each just spent some time alone and I am sure that each of our thoughts were on him throughout the day but being alone gave me the opportunity to feel what I was feeling (which was extreme sadness) and to either cry, sleep, think of things that he's done or said that makes me laugh, watch videos with him in it, etc. That day will be hard on you whether you are with others or alone but just allow yourself to feel whatever it is your are feeling. It will be rough but you'll get through it.

I have one coming up in May as well and my kids have been dreading it already. My son told me I can't make him go to the cemetery and I haven't taken him since the day of the funeral. I tell him his Dad isn't there.

I decided to take my 3 children on a trip to Florida that week and have it just be the four of us. may family is a bit freaked that we won't be here for them to help us but that is not what I want.

I want it to be a time of us being together and to deal with our greif in our own way without anyone trying to help. People mean well but sometimes being alone and just dealing in a way you need is better. At least for me.

I want the kids to have some good memories and being away from home and dealing is what I plan to do.

I am sorry for your loss and I feel the same sense of anxiety and build up and hope that the build up is the worst part.

I'm also coming up to the first anniversary of my Dad's death..May 14th...
I want to find a deep dark hole and hide until its over, but I know I can't..so I'm just going to roll with whatever happens and hope I am sane at the end of it.
Sorry I can't help, but I will be thnking of you as the date comes around. (((hugs)))

ok. my first is sunday. i am dreading it with all my heart. i lost my daddy. i just dk what 2 do?? i no they suck. just do what u need 2. scream, yell, cry, go out stay in. it doesnt matter. do what u need 2.

I just went through my first anniversary of my husband's passing a away. I spent the whole year kind of in a fog, letting it in little by little as I could handle it... I did feel the tension mounting as that anniversary approached... I was afraid to come face to face with it... I dreaded what was going to happen... My adult children live hundreds of miles away, and it helps so that they keep in touch... But I had to go it alone... I expected it to come on Saturday, on the date... I kind of preplanned in my mind how I would call all our adult children on that day...

But it surprised me. I found myself reliving it unexpectedly on the Thursday before that Saturday... It didn't take long for me to figure out that's because it happened on a Thursday...

Saturday was like the Saturday that followed that Thursday, when all of our children plus some of my siblings had immediately flown out to stay with me.. and friends from all over the city just seemed to come out of the woodwork... I never knew there were so many people that cared.. the feeling of being sooo scared for came back on that day... Not the feeling that I was expecting...

A few days later, it was the Wednesday that matched the Wednesday of the funeral... I was just feeling so sad... and I was wondering what I should do for this anniversary... it was time to put away the St. Patrick's Day decor and bring out the Easter flowers...

The thought made me so sad... Flowers were too close to home at that time.. a painful reminder of what they had meant on that Wednesday a year ago...

But I just thought, "I guess this is what I'm supposed to do".. so I proceeded to decorate with flowers for Easter... and when I decided to try something different and hang a bouquet of flowers for Easter on one of my holiday decor nails on the wall, it fell off the nail and landed right smack on top of my husband's urn, where of course, it still is today..

I had been in such a daze... I wasn't even realizing that this time usually involves a trip to the grave, which is an urn in my living room...

It was like I was kindly taken by the hand and so gently shown that this is what I was supposed to do at that time... put flowers on his grave... I was touched, and I took it to mean that even though I was kind of going it alone, I was given a little tiny miracle to help me get through it.. something that maybe meant I wasn't really alone after all...

I hope you are able to be with loved ones at that time, but if not, I believe you will still be looked after one way or another. And remember, we're here.