My son is like that with strangers. He will meet someone once and want them to pick him up. He just cant distinguish between strangers. I dont think the doctors even really know what autsim is. Its a combination of different things. I dont think my son has autism, but he is poisoned by toxins. I am taking him to a genoligist to have test done just to see what they say. I got a referal from my sons doc. I question autism too. I never heard about the creases on the hand sorry I cant help you with that. If you feel doubt about the diagnosis then I would keep asking questions. Something isnt right 1 in 98 children have autism and nobody knows why. They know environmental factors play a part. Isnt that proof that toxins are giving our children this so called autsim. What are they doing about it nothing, but studying genetics.

If you truly believe they made a mistake, get him re diagnosed

God this is all fresh to you and it could even be part of the "grieving" stage.

6 yrs later some family and friends still say "I don't think he's got autism, he was mis diagnosed".

I dunno how much research or anything on autism you've done but EVERY child is different and this disorder affects each differently.


My son for example,


Any other person would think he's "normal" cause he has low anxiety , which is HUGE in autism. He also is VERY calm and none aggressive.

He did bite, hit and stuff till 7 when he finally got his voice.

The major thing on him is his speech. He's got it perfect but a lil slurry cause he just started it 2 yrs ago so it's still coming. But WHAT A RELIEF

that was why most behaviours where happening and once he got communication skills it's been Great. He still has some bahaviour issue, being told NO and anything to do with his obsessions.


Overall, he's high functioning and just like any other child. They get easier as they get older.


One thing about autism is that it's not like having down syndrome or mental retardation ( unless they have those too), but autism is VERY unpredictable like your child's moods and days. It's always a guessing game but their brain is functioning like ours but there so many cells in one part which is the social section area.

So behaviour, communication and social skills are affected some way or another.

Autism also varies

Mild, Moderate to Severe

All I can say is go with the punches and read and do some studying, be careful just not to fall into the "autism" world, thats when the parent becomes the autism and so stuck on it they forgot their baby is still there and always will be. He's still that same boy you've known but labeled now for reading, funding and access to help.

I remember when I found out I ran out to buy Rainman and cried for days cause I was"Is this is gonna be my baby?" and he's total opposite.

Books and stuff aim more to the severe people I noticed but some stuff will be things your son does or sounds like him and others you'll sit there and be like..... THIS ISN'T MY SON.

I go to some workshops and sit and stare blankly cause most of it my child doesn't do, but I love hearing different strategies and tips and ideas on things.


Good Luck

It's a new world and experience but you'll love it. It's a long journey of new beginnings and many accomplishments and surprises and always learning. It's a long road ahead for you that never ends like every parent but it does get better and an amazing experience. I love this world, it's made me who I am today. My son inspires me and teaches me things the world will never know.

as for social settings.

My son LOVES weddings to dance and chats about.

again they all vary but most love people and interaction

I agree with most of what Lisa81 says. My son also like social environments unless they are way too crowded, overly loud, and people too confrontational. But other than that, my guy loves people, Is making friends, loves to dance etc. He for the most part is a pretty good eater, although most mom's want to improve their eating. My son's words are also coming and the behaviour improving as a result. When I was waiting for the neurologist appointment to get him diagnosed (over 3 years ago) much of the info was old and he didn't fit with most of the criteria. He didn't have a problem with eye contact, he was social (but couldn't converse because he didn't have his words yet), at the time he didn't hand flap (it came later and now is lessening), My son smiled, laughed, could hold a pencil, etc. Give it time. He's still young. And it is not necessarily a death sentence. Many of these kids do improve and often are almost typical after a number of years.

I agree with lisa . Knowledge is power and every child is different and as far as the definition of autism, I've been at this for five years now, guess I went through the grieving stage for about a year, costantly read things to myself about everything sam did and then acceptance.

The problem of coming up with a definition of autism is that it is constantly changing and personally, I think there are too many "experts" going in too many directions. I'm all for research but I don't think the experts will ever come up with what caused this epidemic.
When I started my journey, sam was diagnosed as asperger's until november of last year and now I'm told that he doesn't have aspergers because of his speech delay; now the label is mild autism so if you have doubts, get him reevaluated. It won't hurt to get that other evaluation.

"Give it time. He's still young. And it is not necessarily a death sentence. Many of these kids do improve and often are almost typical after a number of years"

God I love that paragraph


Many people act as if autism is a life threatening disease as opposed to it being "a life long disorder"

Then you get those" oh i want to heal, save and cure" bullshit protests and PLEASE don't be a Jenny McCarthy follower. Autism doesn't "go away" nor can you "cure" it." If experts can't well some average Joe won't either and Jenny is loaded and can afford all the luxury but hey in the real world YOU are your child's teacher and always will. Be strong and work with him and it's gonna take MANY tears, blood and sweat through it all but yea it's still your boy.

As she stated my son also hand flapped for awhile but now he only hums to calm down.

I've met parents who went all out....meds, diets and top of the line doctors in hope to "cure" the child.... thousands of dollars later, that boy is still severe and always will be and the improvements they make is gonna happen, just faster when you got the money to pay someone who is expert, but I rather teach him myself then leave him in the hands of doctors.

Well, if you feel uncomfortable with the diagnosis then get him re-tested. As what I think the spectrum is very large and my little boy Brett is very very social, has eye contact, talks, converses, but like you said there are things like repeating phrases and Brett has a lot of anxiety. There are many things on the spectum, Retts syndrome is one of them, many things on the spectrum maybe you should find out what else is. Good luck, Denise

yeah I can definitely vouch for the social interaction thing. I've had autism all my life, and I can safely say I LOVE strangers, being in the spotlight, etc over the computer, and in person as long as I don't have to talk to them one on one in social situations.

On here that is easy, but in person, its more difficult I think, but yeah in social situations I am a social butterfly. I love listening to people, interacting with other people, thats why I joined the Student Leadership Academy at achool, because I wanted to learn how to interact with people more then I do.

I found out doing that, one of my strengths is to inspire. having autism, I never understood how I inspire people, until I realized, its not in person where I use my gift of inspiration, its over the computer where I use it most. in the words I type to others both in public and private situations, and in person yeah I can be a social butterfly, but talking to people one on one, I guess its called verbal communication and interpersonal communication, thats what I cannot do very well. I also have a very poor vocabulary, and I forget things as soon as people tell me them almost, not unless I somehow put things into long term memory, but like, I have no short term memory at all, just zippo. hehe. I can remember numbers better then letters though, but that is unique to each person I think. Also even though I'm a good writer and inspirer, I don't comprehend what I read very well at all, so its kinda strange, but normal to all this I guess.

yeah, that repeating phrases is a big one for me too. I'll sometimes forget that I said the same thing in two different forums, happens to me often. hehe. Its like, I get on a subject, and can't move on to another subject, like I go on and on and on about that one subject. Thats what I mean by interpersonal communication, I cannot sit and have a conversation like most people can. I try to watch a soap opera and have NO clue what is going on, how they go from one subject to the next and next and back again, that confuses me I could never keep up. I love talking to people and interacting with others, I'm just not very good at talking to people socially like most people do towards eachother I guess. plus when people do talk to me, it takes me a few minutes to think of something to say back in response, while over the computer I can think of what to say almost instantly, except I prefer to go back and edit my posts because I'm a perfectionist when it comes to spelling and use of grammar and all that, but usually what happens when I am allowed to edit my posts, is they get 2x longer cuz I think of more stuff to say when I go back and edit. lol. so its probably a good thing I'm not allowed to go back and edit on these public posts. hehe.

One thing to note that there are many spectum traits and you don't have to have them all to qualify as ASD. You would know Downs syndrom if you saw it. The thing is none of the spectrum people are the same, so get the best opportunities to get him a good life, and most of all, love your baby!

I know this is very difficult to accept and of course we all want to think that theirs a chance that our children were mis diagnosed. My son doesn't like to be held, however will hug others, say "Hello Sir" to any one and will high five anyone that asks him. Yeah the lack of eye contact is a sign of Autism. Look just, because our Children have Autism their ability to socialize and understand may differ from one another. If you do feel that strongly have him re evaluated..

i fell the same as you as a matter of fact i have the same questions as you.to tell you the truth i have been sitting here for 2 days trying to figure out anything and every thing.so not only were you trying to get ansers for your self.you got ansers for me. so i guess what im trying to say is thank you for the question.i know that i couldnt be of much help to you now on this topic but just so you know your not the only one out there feeling this way.hang in there and god bless.

Your son sounds a lot like mine. He is 6 now and up until about a year ago we were still questioning whether or not he has autism. However, once he started kindergarten and struggled with staying on task, following directions, etc., we knew. He also does a lot of repeating of movie lines. It is called echolalia.
I do feel for you though because Eli has a lot of things that do not fit either. He has a huge imagination and spends hours playing with his toys acting out stories.
Like the others said, you can always get a second opinion. When Eli was almost 4 the doctors said it was not autism. So they do make mistakes.