Asperger Syndrome Support Group
Asperger syndrome - also referred to as Asperger's syndrome, Asperger's, Aspergers or just AS - is one of five neurobiological pervasive developmental disorders (PDD), and is characterized by deficiencies in social and communication skills, normal to above normal intelligence, and standard language development.
since we aspies arent much good at social skills we often cant tell whether someone is bullying us or teasing us
teasing is meant to be nice and helpful and you are expected to tease back, some like teasing and being teased. It helps to say " I am being teased" to let them see you realise whats happening
bullying is meant to be nasty with the bully getting pleasure at being nasty to you
any comments?
teasing is meant to be nice and helpful and you are expected to tease back, some like teasing and being teased. It helps to say " I am being teased" to let them see you realise whats happening
bullying is meant to be nasty with the bully getting pleasure at being nasty to you
any comments?
teasing can also be done in a gentle funloving way, like when someone who likes you pokes you gently causing both of you to giggle madly.
Bullying is bad teasing on steroids, and I think it has some more ominous purpose than sadistic pleasure. I think that the person who is bullying is getting a power trip out of it.
Like harry states, it is frequently hard for the Aspie to realize the difference. An Aspie's perception of things, remarks, etc. can often be way off base. I have worked with my g-daughter with the help of her occupational therapist to help her determine the difference at the time it is happening.
We tease her in a friendly loving manner and she has learned to tease us back. She has also learned that usually it is better to ignore the person that is bullying so as not to pour fuel on the fire. I am so proud of her when she comes home from school and tells me of "hurtful" teasing (bullying) that has happened and that she has openly chosen not to react to the hurtful comments. She has earned the respect of some of her classmates that have heard the hurtful comments and they have chosen to stand by her. I do report the incidents to the school administration, just so they are aware and will understand if at some point the g-daughter cannot restrain herself and reacts to the bully.
I can't expect people to respect me if I don't tell them how I feel, so I do. But I'm forty eight years old now, and have learned to speak up.
My kids on the other hand, haven't learned that skill well yet. They do often misinterpret friendly teasing, but I still think even if it is meant to be friendly at first, if they express displeasure at it, and the teasing continues anyway, it's no longer friendly teasing, and has crossed the line. The key is whether or not they've said anything about how it makes them feel. If they aren't recognizing outright cruel remarks, I take it upon myself to explain it to them. I think they should know. But for myself, I don't care if people mean it, and I don't notice. It isn't worth my effort.