Anxiety Support Group
Anxiety is a physical condition marked by intense and persistent feelings of distress, fear, angst or dread. General anxiety caused by routine day-to-day stresses usually passes quickly and is experienced by almost everyone at one time or another. However, such feelings that linger over time and are very difficult to cope with, and which lack a clear cause, may indicate...
I have been having a difficult time with my parents. They don't really take my anxiety seriously, and tend to make fun of it. They will say things that they know trigger/upset me, and then say things like, "Oh yeah, not supposed to talk about that" and then laugh. I know they do it on purpose because there is never a reason for them to bring those things up. If I ever tell them I'm worried about something, their advice is to say "Just stop worrying about it", "You need to stop", or "Knock it off". It hurts because I only have talked to them about my anxiety a handful of times, and have stopped talking to them about it because of this.
My anxiety gets so bad to the point that I will be throwing up for hours or even days. My parents get frustrated with me because of that, since I have missed school because of this. My mom will get mad and say things like "Really? This is happening again?"
I know I need to forgive them, but how can I when they do this all the time? I try to forgive them, but my dad was just doing it again tonight. I am very scared of my dad (a separate issue), so it's not something I can talk to him about, and my mom won't take me seriously. They have no idea how debilitating my anxiety is. It keeps me from doing things that I love, and I can't talk to anyone about it.
-
I haven't written in my diary on my computer since May because I thought that my computer was dying. I got away from writing but my computer is hanging in there. I think that I will start writing in it again. It's so therapeutic.
-
Years ago, I won a mirrored armoire from my job. It's in my bedroom but I rarely stand in front of it. Yesterday, I had to have a dexascan done so I had to change into a gown. There was a full length mirror in the changing room. I'm aware that I gained 5 to 7 pounds over the last year from cheating on Keto but I didn't know what it looked like. It was a reality check.
Forgiveness is a good thing, but only when you're ready to forgive. Don't be forced into doing something before you're ready. Do it in your own time.
We can choose our friends, but we don't choose our families, so it's really difficult when close family members don't understand our plight. Being mocked and misunderstood is not very conducive for healing. Is there someone else that you can talk to or is there someone that you trust that you can confide in? Your family isn't giving you the emotional support that you need, so it might be wise to look to a professional or someone similar.
With anxiety, we don't feel safe. Usually, our family makes us feel safe. If yours is making you feel vulnerable, then it might be time to find a safe person to talk to. I hope you find your truth.
This very forum is one of my safe places to do precisely that.
Keep venting, Ooms. Listening. . . You are not alone.
Be gentle with yourself and patient with the process.
My family has a varied view of anxiety. My parents 'suck it up and move on' worked to provide me with a positive direction learning how to manage 'in the moment'.
Remember this: just because they say it does NOT make it your problem to solve. You know it bothers you, so step back, stop, pause, breathe, choice until you are clear headed and calm in the moment. Their view is their choice, their decision, not yours. You are responsible for what you say, do, act, react, and respond. Once you take charge of your well-being first and focus on what works for you from yourself, you will be able to change how you handle working with them.
Someone who says "stop worrying about it" shows their lack of experience in having overwhelming anxiety. That's the best understanding they have of it, to distract the thought.
Healing within yourself will allow you to move forward and gain a better balance with your parents. They are individuals with their own flaws.
You are much stronger than you realize. Keep writing it out and finding the better balance that works for you!
I love my parents, and want to forgive them, but I know it will just take time. For now, I am just trying to hold out until I am done with high school and can move out. I am very close with my older sister, but she is married, pregnant, lives away from us, and I don't want to burden her with my struggles.