Anxiety Support Group
Anxiety is a physical condition marked by intense and persistent feelings of distress, fear, angst or dread. General anxiety caused by routine day-to-day stresses usually passes quickly and is experienced by almost everyone at one time or another. However, such feelings that linger over time and are very difficult to cope with, and which lack a clear cause, may indicate...
I have to ask. Has anyone every thought of how you would handle losing a parent, spouse or child to death? I fear death and sometimes I worry so much that something is going to happen to one of my kids. I image how things will happen and even try to image how i would feel. Has anyone else thought like this? It kinda scares me because I dont know why I cant stop thinking of it.
My daughter has OCD and has this same fear that can encompass her whole day. I think about it..and freak out about it..and get anxious about it...It's so scary.
However, "They" say it's one of those things that is going to happen and we have no way to stop it. BUt I am with you.
i think we all have these thoughts sometimes, and its harder for anxious people because we dwell on these thoughts, and sometimes worry ourselves sick.
when i was a little girl i would really worry about losing one of my parents, i told my dad my worries and he said "my mum will die one day and i will be sad, but its just part of life". i used to think about death alot as a child because in a couple of years we lost a few family members, a friend and pets in a pretty short time frame. i would think about my parents dying and tears would come into my eyes, i even thought about myself dying and that brought tears aswell.
in my later life my family has taken a different stance on death, we approach it almost with a sense of humour. Part of my therapy at home is to watch shows with alot of black humour like monty python and south park, i found this really helps me stop being scared.
although when we lose someone, we are so so sad, but we also like to remember happy times, and laugh in their honor. i remember at my great nans funeral (she lived to 93) we were told a quote that she used to say even in her late years "stawberries make you sexy" and we all laughed and cried.
in my family we joke about death, even though we know we will be devestated if we lost each other. my dad says he doesnt mind dying because he wants to have a rest and my sister and i reassure him that we will bury him with his reading glasses, a newspaper and some coffee. me and my sister joke about my funeral saying my sister will hobble up to my coffin and tap it with her walking stick and say "good riddins".
i think the main thing is to not waste time worrying about might what happen, and enjoy the time was have with the ones we love. if we lose someone we love, we just have to cross that bridge when we come to it. im sorry if that sounds horrible, its just that life is so short, and all the worrying in the world wont change the future.
i know thoughts of losing the ones we love are horrible and distressing, have you tried writing them down somewhere?, do you see a therapist that you can talk about these thoughts with?
take care xx
but it's the truth. you're not.
i probably think about it every day.
i just want there to be peace. and the more i can convinvce myself that those that pass on are truly at peace, the btter i feel.
peace and light
People with anxiety disorders are control freaks. Every single one of us. And death is the one thing...the ultimate thing...that we have no control over. It is my greatest fear and sometimes keeps me up at night. I worry about my own death and I worry about the deaths of my children because if something happened to one of them it would absolutely devastate me. But I try to take something positive out of that fear, and that is that I appreciate every moment of my life..good and bad. I appreciate every moment I have with my kids and my husband and I never take a minute for granted because I know it could all end anytime. I try to remember that none of were born with any written guarantees that we would live to be a hundred. There is no rule that says our children get to outlive us or that we get to grow old with our spouse. Now,
normally, I would say not to think about such things and to forget about stuff like that. But with this one instance, I make an exception. Without dwelling on it, we need to keep in the back of our minds that life is very uncertain and that sometimes bad things happen, and we could lose our own lives or a loved ones life in an instant. We all need to be aware of that. It is the only way to truly appreciate our children and our families and every moment we are alive. And if we should lose a loved one, it really helps to know that we gave them everything we had and that we valued them and never took them for granted.
I learned a lot after my mom died 2 years ago. I had been scared of her death ever since I was a little girl. I was scared to death of what I would do or how I would handle it. I wondered if I was strong enough to handle that kind of pain. Well, then I lost her very suddenly, and I never got a chance to say good-bye. It was awful and horrible, and it still hurts to this day, but I know I will be all right. We are all stronger than we give ourselves credit for. But I found that it wasn't only her death that I focused on...although that was extremely painful...but it was how guilty I felt at the way I treated her while she was alive.
Still to this day, I replay in my mind all the mean things I said to her and the fact that I hardly ever told her I loved her. I just wasn't a very good daughter. There was nothing I could do about her death.... it was her time to go and I was powerless to stop it. But I did control the way I treated her before she died and it would have brought me so much comfort to know that I had been kinder to her and more supportive and appreciative of her. Because I loved her so much and I never told her what she meant to me, and now I will never see her again and she will never know. So I decided to learn something from that and I tell my family I love them and I appreciate them and I don't take them for granted, and if God forbid, something ever happens to them, I will take comfort in the fact that they knew they were loved. That is something we CAN control and we are not powerless over.