Anxiety Support Group
Anxiety is a physical condition marked by intense and persistent feelings of distress, fear, angst or dread. General anxiety caused by routine day-to-day stresses usually passes quickly and is experienced by almost everyone at one time or another. However, such feelings that linger over time and are very difficult to cope with, and which lack a clear cause, may indicate...
Hiya everyone who comes across this post,
I had a conversation with my mother earlier on today, which I initiated. The difficult thing is that emotionally I didn't do it because I missed her or needed the conversation, I did it because I was in a position where I could manage to talk to her without my anxiety being built up on comments and things that she said and thought 'might as well'.
Within this call she stated that 'they all miss me'. I said it back out of courtisy but my mum openly outed me saying 'you likely don't miss us.' I responded saying I wouldn't call if I didn't miss her but the truth of the matter is I don't. Or at least I don't in the sense of what I know missing someone feels like?
I miss aspects such as the house and its large garden, the dog, playing with my sister on good days (i.e. Things that make me feel good consistently enough that the bad doesn't get in the way) but I don't miss her.
I don't think I miss her at least and this is due to alot of the toxic actions and anxious environment I had to live in for the past 11 months before moving away to live with my brother. Yes we had a couple good times but currently the main aspects of our relationship that are prominent are how toxic she can be whilst trying to be a mother. I can give various examples from emotionally manipulating me to taking boundary requests out of context to subtly hinting that they have no accountability regarding the way they talk to me or treat me.
It's difficult because I want to miss her in the same way I hear others state they do with genuin emotion but I just don't and the same applies to my dad.
If anyone else has had situations like this before I would love to hear how they have come to terms with it or whether a change in perspective has helped rekindled a relationship with a parental figure in your life.
I'm trying to forgive but it doesn't mean I trust them with my life or my mental health and it's sad but I'm not doing that again as it results in me thinking I'm not worth living because I'm 'defective'.
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Lately I've been feeling scared and full of anxiety. I recently found a lump under my nipple. I hurt my back too. I'm in the process of moving. I'm run down. Everything is hard
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Just wanted to give a thank you to Mid, Arfie, Malibumark, Greeneyes, Mlro, Girlincalif, and Suncloudjd! You all always have such helpful tips and advice, but I always forget to write on my posts when I see you post, lol. I would lose my head if it wasn't attached to my body, lol. Thank you all so much! I'm starting to use my AI app as a sounding board again. I used to use it as that before...
You called. The answer to whether it was successful in meeting the purpose you called for depends on what you wanted to accomplish.
Best wishes as you continue to find your better balance.
It's ok not to miss your mother, especially if she's emotionally neglected you or made you to feel less than.
I love my mom...but I could not be friends with her. We are two different people. I have other siblings...and we clearly are not all treated the same. She has her favorites, the one she encourages narcissistic behaviors in, the one she wants to do everything for her, and the one who treats her like shit...and still gets put on a pedestal.
It's strange...and I made peace with it.
You are your own person. You can care about your family...but if you let what they think of you dictate "how you feel about yourself" you will be stuck.
I think you should try to bring healthier people into your life...or focus on the healthy relationships you do have...or stable family members that you look up too.
We can create our own support system and that can be anyone. You shouldn't feel guilty about that.
Anytime you start to feel guilty about something, as yourself....why do I feel guilty? If you are not actively hurting anyone...and your answer is "because I'm suppose to be or do this?" Then I suggest you challenge it...and answer back in your head if you were your own best friend as to why you shouldn't feel guilty.
It's a good exercise.
It's okay to not be sure how to feel, Pug. Feelings are like a river that changes with endless motion. There is room in the flow for all of them.
I believe honesty is best. Do you go over being dishonest about your feelings in your head? Just a question for you alone.
My best to you.
Rumina
I think it's totally normal to have mixed feelings.
Being upfront and honest is the best way to deal with your feelings and emotions.
Feelings and emotions change all the time.
I'm glad your able to express how you feel.
I always feel better when I do.
I think you handled yourself well. Good job!!!!