Anxiety Support Group

Anxiety is a physical condition marked by intense and persistent feelings of distress, fear, angst or dread. General anxiety caused by routine day-to-day stresses usually passes quickly and is experienced by almost everyone at one time or another. However, such feelings that linger over time and are very difficult to cope with, and which lack a clear cause, may indicate...

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My Mother!

pamela502
pamela502

So I got let go from my job almost 2 weeks ago. My mom owns a clothing store and has said several times for me to work for her. She pays less than I was making and I need my time to look for work until my nest egg runs out. She sends me a hateful message today about how she is angry with me because I am not going to run her store while she is on vacation and people who know the situation are asking why. For one, I only told my mom, dad and SO, so if anyone else knows it's my mom telling them. I know she is probably trash talking to her customers and I'm agervated! My reasoning is, her store is too clustered and gives me anxiety and she has the behind the desk part so full I literally can not fit back there! And she would pay me less than my unemployment! I wish my mom wasn't overbearing and controlling! And btw, I'm 33 and have lived out of her house for 15 years! What are some things I can say to her to let her know she needs to leave me alone about this? 

jewells1
jewells1
Maybe "some people make better parents than employers" Or "I know your system makes sense to you, but my need for order would find you lost when you came back" or "even if you paid me under the table I would spend it all the merchandise. So it's much safer for my budget not to be tempted" Or "This how much I need ______, to keep afloat and still have time to search for a long-term financial friendly position" or....
Community LeaderMid
Mid
It is a situation that needs a life affirmation statement to allow you to move forward completely. It is not safe for you to work for your mom, a cluttered work environment is not safe. It is not up to you to cover your mom's vacation - she can close up the shop for her vacation. In other words, do your positive talking practice in front of a mirror until you're comfortable, and then do not respond to her negative statements. Refer your mind to the affirmative statement that you are looking for a long-term financial stable position at the same rate of pay or more than what you were previously making, and keep it to the facts.
The hardest conversations we avoid are often the ones we need to step up to, in order to build our strength and our confidence going forward.
Best wishes!
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