I have really bad social anxiety and GAD. For years I was jealous of
others that seemed to have none of my problems. I've finally accepted
that other people have different difficulties and I just got unlucky in the anxiety department. Hope you can see your former therapist. Maybe look online and for books that pertain to your situation. You might find some techniques to
use right now.

Yes I have a book I am reading and go back to understand and reread. So I’m trying.

Personally, I am growing ever more convinced that "Good Insurance" is an oxymoron. I started my psychotherapy when few companies even covered psychotherapy. I still consider the dollars I paid out of pocket as among the sounder investments in my financial portfolio. A dollar invested in my head is a dollar no one can take away from me. These days I don't even check with my insurance carriers. They contribute more stress than help when I try.

Several of my more effective therapists have hounded me pretty hard about the diffs between "Jealousy" (the fear of loss) and "Envy" (the desire to possess). The more I chew that nitpicky nut, the more sense it makes. I am, indeed, jealous of my mental health issues. Come and take them, please, oh perfect people whose perfection I envy. I'll pay shipping charges.

But I understand that people may have the same issues or ones that are worse.
I really don’t mean jealous of people, I more so mean that there is nothing I want , physical possessions. I would give up anything (but health of course) to make this go away.
It’s the saddest , most depressing, thing. I mean I try to think back when I used to wake up in the morning and just get up and start my day. That’s what I’m jealous of.

Try it. Just get up and get going. No thinking involved.

Focus on the things, basic things, anything to switch your mind into movement in the moment.

You can do this. You are strong enough to shed the tears, wipe them off, and stand up, shoulders back, smile natural and move into the moment.

Why do we think so much? I just had to run a quick errand and bring something back here for people working in our yard. And why did I go with my mind so heavy. Why couldn't I just drive there and do what I needed.
And it's crazy because I'm running out and getting in the car but my mind is just on the fact that I feel crappy. The woman in the store probably didn't know. I was friendly and we had a nice exchange. That's why I'll say, I never know what others are going through.. Do they feel the same as I do, do they feel worse.
I do believe (other than taking of benzo, the antidepressants will slowly be started back up) I just don't think there is any other way at this point.

It’s just hard to function when unhappy.

Be direct with your therapist. Tell her what you said here. Ask her straight out what is the plan here and if she can’t articulate that to you, move on.

A little different perspective, we're paying out of pocket, this is the third therapist for my wife, probably the best but no real progress.

Sorry, but I think the patient needs to work on setting and implementing goals. My wife was super-skilled and functional for 65 years, we ran into a tough time moving, and she now has substantial anxiety severely impacting her and my life. Therapists try to teach her skills, (I'm in at the end of session) but she doesn't do it. If you had a football quarterback coach, say the best ever, who told the player what to practice each day for 3 hours, and the player said I can't get motivated to do it. would the failure be the coach's fault.

Not trying to be hard and candidly reflecting my own frustration with my wife's current lack of progress. But if you want to get better and people tell you what to do, and you don't do them, how is it the teacher's fault- if a husband has had multiple affairs, his wife brings him for counseling and the counselor emphasizes the importance of fidelity and he has another affair, can he say, this is my libido, and the counselor failed to tell me how to control it so this is her fault. .

Marian,

Oh I thought when you said you may have to find someone else, that you meant divorcing your husband... who has been a source of mental and emotional abuse to you, and contributing to your anxiety and depression.

I agree with the other posts. That we just have to "do it". Get out there. Challenge your anxiety. Good for you for going to the store, talking with the cashier, getting your errand done. Doesn't matter that you did not feel "perfect" doing it. The good thing is that you went and did it.

We are too hard on ourselves. Give yourself credit each day for what you did do. Not focus on the negative, of what we didn't do.

A therapist can only do so much, as posted above. They tell us things, and then we have to do the "homework".

You can do this. Just take a step forward.

I am unsure how I was taken in my post.
I am saying I am having just a tough time with the anxiety

I Mentioned I have a great relationship with my therapist, have known her for years, but it becomes more of my just venting. )There have been other people on this forum saying they changed therapists.) And no. she is not giving me homework or things to try at home. During our session she will make comments that help me feel better. For the time being I will stay with her because I look forward to talking to her. But honestly it’s talking to a friend.

Yes, I do try to get out and do my daily stuff. Uncomfortable many times, but I go.

Are you seeing your therapist for anxiety specifically, or depression or just general help? I think it matters in terms of the therapeutic goals, the homework or techniques to try. It helps to have someone to talk to for sure and the therapist may be assessing you as you talk, to figure out a game plan but it really is ok to ask directly for what you hope to get out of the therapeutic process.

Sometimes if you see someone for a long time it can become stale, like just going through the motions.

I’m seeing her for general help so all of my issues, which are a lot.
I don’t think we are going through the motions. It really doesn’t feel like that.
I think I have so much going on and I’m emotional and there’s something new, it seems like every week, that our time runs out and I just get everything off my chest.
If I was going to just help myself and not tell her all my problems we may get somewhere.
So maybe a bit unfair of me to say she isn't providing the proper help. With the time we have, I usually can fill it with all my issues and anything new that happened since our last conversation. So yes, we don't have time for a "plan" so to speak.

I get the value in venting for sure. It helps in the short term. I just don't know how much it ultimately helps in changing our behavior or helping our mindset in the long term. I suspect you're starting to see that based on what you say in your post, about reaching out to your former therapist. You're working through it. That's good. .

Right. But when the therapist is the only person in your life who knows everything, when you speak with her there’s so much I have to get off my chest.