Anxiety Support Group
Anxiety is a physical condition marked by intense and persistent feelings of distress, fear, angst or dread. General anxiety caused by routine day-to-day stresses usually passes quickly and is experienced by almost everyone at one time or another. However, such feelings that linger over time and are very difficult to cope with, and which lack a clear cause, may indicate...
Hi Everyone,
I'm looking for some insight as to how to help/understand my husband. He works away from home for approximately 3 months at a time. While he is away he is very stressed about home life and thinking i will leave him because he is away. He is upset that life goes on without him and that when he is coming home its like he has to try to "grab onto a moving train" to get back into home life. But then when he gets home he is stressed and anxious beyond belief about not making money due to being at home. And there is always something that needs to be done or paid for at home. We both have alot of debt which is also an emotional issue as well because it seems to feel like its crushing us.
It has come to the point where he can spend a whole day at home doing absolutely nothing but scrolling social media and playing video games. He has no ambition, and is irritated, and lazy, and even to the point where we haven't had sex in over a full month since he came home from work. And while on that note, when he's at work he will message me saying how he wishes he was home and that he misses me, and what things he would like to do sexually to me. But when he gets home that just falls apart immediately.
Has anyone else experienced this with a loved one? What the heck do I do!? He will not go to counselling, so instead will sit in his anxiety and let it fester. It's creating a space between us I feel.
I try to give him time to re adjust when he gets home, to have a day or two to just sleep and eat and do whatever he pleases. But that's difficult as well because i dont always know the exact date he will come home, and I have a life and work and a schedule to keep to while he's away. So that has to continue even when he gets home.
He also doesnt like to converse about these things. So i feel stuck between a rock and a hard place.
Anyone have any suggestions how I can help him, or make life easier or soemthing?
Honestly a different job is a fantastic idea if it werent for money. I think that would help give him a normal daily life.
Gain some insight on your own life and what YOU and you alone want your life to be like.
I spent decades trying to change my ex, my kids, my parents.....and the list goes on and on.
When I finally got sick and tired of being left behind, disrespected, ignored, treated poorly......I got the help I needed and changed my life.
I learned that you can't help others if you can't help yourself first.
I found self respect, self love, and self improvement......getting out of learned helplessness helped me move ahead in life. In return, the peeps in my life are in my life on my terms and some of those that treated me poorly, disrespected me, crossed boundaries, ignored me......and made me feel helpless changed too. Some are still in my life, but play on my playground with mutual respect, love, and allow me to be me without judgement. Some fell out of my life and it is for the best. I don't hate them and wish them well, but they can not be in my life.
My life is awesome and getting better every day.
Yeah, I still have bad days.....but the good outweighs the bad by far.
I have learned that life is way to short to live trying to change others and be unhappy.
There is something to be said for peace and quiet.......and love.
Sending out love and light to all :)