Im sorry that happened. Sometimes we say things out of frustration. I have been guilty of that too and we hurt the people we love the most. Its not an excuse though. He needs to work on not lashing out. Sending you big hugs . Hope he apologizes .

Talk with him. Tell him what it is that you need from him. For example, maybe you just need someone to listen. Tell him that.

Sometimes the people in our lives don't know what to do, or how they can help us. We have to tell them what it is that would help us (To listen to us, to help with this or that, etc)

my boyfriend says everything is my 100% my fault for how i am as a person

Hello, it sounds to me your boyfriend could be struggling with something try and talk to him it's hard belive everything is your fault how long have you been together do you think you need a break for a short time and talk things over.

I am sorry that you are hurting. I know it might be hard to see at the moment but the pain, what you are feeling at the moment is only temporary. Take a deep breath and know thay this pain and hurt won't last always.

I am not sure what caused your boyfriend to make those remarks or the details surrouning the situation
One of the things that I have learned through attending therapy is this:
People who don't have depression/anxiety often do not understand what it is like for those that do. You can try to explain it but they still don't truly comprehend how it impacts life and how to show up and support loved ones.

He may feel confused, overwhelmed, or defeated because he doesn't know how to help. Let him know what he can do to help and support you.

Writing in detail about how someone has hurt me goes a long way toward helping me sort what is pure BS to be disregarded and what is a psycho tick I can actually work on with the goal of growing my functional skills.

Details, please.

Generalized support while you decide whether or not to take the risk of sharing details. Hope healing happens here.

One of the first statements to remember when you are listening and the other person says something that is 'hurtful, mean, hateful, or otherwise negative' is to step back, pause, and breathe before you answer.

Often, we say things from a different perspective and where it may seem he's saying it about you, it may in fact be what he's saying to himself out loud and wanting you to give him reasons it is not him.

Those kinds of words do not bring about the conversation that would clear the air gently. However, if you can get past the 'feeling' and just talk calmly without being personal (this is really difficult to do, breathing and pausing help), you often learn something about their way of feeling.

Best wishes as you make your way through this challenge.