I wish I had an easy way to describe "just let it go". Some may disagree with me, but I really suggest seeking some help with a therapist and or psychiatrist. Medication can be very helpful. Your worries are not unusual, but the way you process them will most likely continue without some help. My worries are never ending, but with some medication, have been able to better handle and learn to minimize those worries. Much support in living for today and trusting that you are not alone. There is much help these days.

Hi. I'm glad you shared here. I understand; for at any age, they are our children. I have a 27 year old daughter, 25 year old son and 12 year old daughter. I have learned that being a spectator is what letting go and letting God means, in this instance (at least for me), for they are his children too. A Christian parent...do you trust God? Do you have limits on that trust? Does He? I do believe in meeting with my therapist (Christian) every week. But it can take time to find one that fits, not only all the red tape (insurance, etc...), but most importantly that you feel safe there, and that a healthy therapeutic relationship develops, and trust develops, and the therapist's job is suppose to be all about you. Is that not wonderful! Time focusing on this will may help in more ways than you know or not.

Welcome to the community!

I think that therapy can be helpful sometimes but I believe the first step is to make sure the anxiety and worry aren't the result of a physical issue.

Some find that vitamins or hormones are off. Others learn their thyroid isn't functioning properly. For me, they learned I have a very common mutation in the MTHFR gene that depleted my folate levels. Once I cut out folic acid in my diet and added a special folate vitamin, I was cured of the anxiety I'd had for 40+ years.

I still worry, but it's fading in unexpected ways. A friend or family member will comment "Wow, you're not worried about..." and I'll realize I'm not.

Point in case: I have a small surgery next week (just local anesthesia) and I'm not even really thinking about it. And while I'm concerned about my kids, of course, I'm not worried about them all the time like I used to be. And while I want to stay on top of finances and career stuff, it doesn't keep me up at night.

If there's no physical cause, Cognitive Behavioral Therapy can be helpful. Propranalol is a medicine that is older, with no side effects, it's inexpensive and it will help with the rapid heartbeat and can help prevent migraines.

I'm so glad you've found a good support group and would suggest you might want to add a few groups you can connect with and find support but in a fun way - a knitting group, pottery group, cooking class, game playing group, gardening class, book club or so on. You can find support there but the focus tends towards the healthy and productive.

Husbands can be wonderful or sometimes they can be poop heads. Fortunately, there are a lot of people who would love to be friends with you. You just need to find them.

Sending some hugs along to you. And when you feel crummy, I know it sounds simplistic but sometimes music or a funny movie can provide a bit of salve. Not that it's a cure and I'm not discounting depression. But it can provide some healthy, temporary relief.

Thank you for your heartfelt replies. I actually have 4 children, ages 32,29, 26, and 23, and I STILL worry and fret over them. And when you add in the grandchildren, it gets even worse. I am, however, involved in many other things. I work out about 5 days a week, at the gym, and I also am involved in Bible study. I also have a very close group of friends. Actually tonight we were out celebrating one of their birthdays. And its not like I can't function...I actually can. It is more like when I get off by myself, or in the middle of the night, I wake up and I start worrying and obsessing about things. But for some reason I can't explain, maybe hormonal like one of you suggested, it has just gotten so much worse this past year. I am 53, so that could explain a lot of it. There has been no physical abuse at all, although I guess you could say emotional abuse since my 29 year old estranged, so that is quite painful. I will say it really does help to be able to talk about it here in a place where I feel safe and not judged. Thank you.

What do you worry about? The pain of estrangement, maybe life's twists and turns. You seem to have a lot of the right tools in other family, friends and support. Exercising is excellent. In the end, God grants us the strength and comfort to move forward in clarity. Perhaps you just need a little sleep medication to help when you feel a greater anxiety at night. Have you had a good check up lately? I don't do the friend thing, but feel free to message me anytime. I can just speak of my own experiences. Hope you get a good nights rest.

Thank you. Yes, I take an over the counter sleep aid almost every night. Actually, last night was one of the best night's sleep I have had. I only woke up once, to go to the bathroom, and then I went right back to sleep. Yes, I have checkups every 6 months because of some medication I am on for my cholesterol. Otherwise, I am in excellent health. I am 5'6, 126 pounds, really in good shape, other than my anxiety. When I say I worry, it is really kind of like obsessive negative thoughts that get ahold of me. As I had mentioned, if I do wake up and my son isn't home, I worry he's been killed. My husband has a job requiring extensive travel and I worry the plane will crash. If I call him and he doesn't answer, I am afraid he's been mugged and murdered. My 2 year old grandson isn't talking yet so I worry about autism or apraxia or God knows what else. I google everything! If I have a bump or a bruise, I automatically suspect cancer. When my daughter was pregnant I was sure each time she went for a sonogram there would be no heartbeat, even though there was no reason to think that! I know this is a terrible way for me to behave, and I am a Christian, and I really think it is a terrible thing for me to have so little trust. So I pray and I pray, and I try to always think of my blessings, which are many. And I will do better for awhile, then the old negative thoughts come back. I will say I have been doing much, much better in regards to my anxiety over the estrangement. Now that we are totally estranged with no contact, my anxiety has lessened. I think God has spared me in that way. By not having any contact at all I am not able to see the daily destruction in my son's life, so by not seeing it, I can sort of just detach from it. It was truly a horrible experience that I went through with him and his new wife, and I guess if there was any abuse at all, that is who it came from....those two. Mental abuse. She is a borderline, narcissist who wreaked all sorts of chaos and havoc in our family, not just with me, but the entire family. So it is better we don't see them. But I had anxiety issues even before that. I really think I have been like this most of my life but it has just gotten worse. Talking about it helps tremendously though. After I joined this group yesterday I felt a huge weight off my shoulders.

I agree, I can see you have much to be thankful for. I'm glad you had a better night. I know how many people hate taking meds, but perhaps a mild mood stabilizer would be worth trying. I'm sure you stay busy, but it sure helps to be able to immerse yourself into a fun project or hobby. As you know, none of us know the future, so do your best to live for today. Keep that trust and faith that all is in HIS hands.

Thank you. I may try the Lexapro again, who knows? Sometimes I really feel like an occasional Xanax would work even better, just something to calm me down. But I would not want to get addicted to anything. I sincerely meant it when I said just by joining this site I felt some relief. I feel much better today. I can't really describe the feelings I get. It goes back and forth between feelings of gloom and doom, and then just absolute fear, and terror even, with my mouth dry, my heart racing, my hands shaking. Almost like fight or flight syndrome, yet there is no real danger. It is so stupid and I feel so ashamed when I am so very lucky and blessed to have all I do. And I most definitely believe in prayer and will continue to do so.

If 6ou didn't like Lexapro maybe there is something else that will be better. I think you need something. It will change your attitude markedly. It will make others easier to bear and it will make you easier to bear. I found the flip side of anxiety is control. That and a kind of paranoia. Being released from it has made a huge difference to me and to the lives of the people I love. Your church might give counselling services or at least pastoral care. Do what reed says about the b vitamin and if it is not that, try another medicine. And always give it a month. Your body takes time to adjust. I would say unless it makes you throw up all day long take it because the disorder is so incredibly destructive then almost any side effect is worth it.

*that. Sorry, typing on phone while kittens chase each other all over me.

@ MoreOrLessss: Giving you the benefit of being new here, let me suggest you read the Rules of the Road. One might mistake all your postings today as a commercial solicitation. I have found all your links and your personal stories questionable.

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