Anxiety Support Group

Anxiety is a physical condition marked by intense and persistent feelings of distress, fear, angst or dread. General anxiety caused by routine day-to-day stresses usually passes quickly and is experienced by almost everyone at one time or another. However, such feelings that linger over time and are very difficult to cope with, and which lack a clear cause, may indicate...

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I am so anxious and angr

Katydid
Katydid

my boss is driving me crazy, I just don't know what to do, I can't work with this overbearing monster. I picture myself punching her right square in the nose (and I have a pretty good right hand). Of course I don't. I can't even figure out how to stand up for myself. I voice my opinion, but she basically says it's her way, period, no discussion. She shows no respect for me, for my knowledge, for my tenure with the company (25+ years). I can't make a decision to save my life, because she disagrees with everything and now I question everything. If I said it was sunny outside she would say it was raining. And then I tried an experiment.... I made a decision, which was exactly the opposite of what I would normally do, and I was still wrong. To top it off, I agreed with something that she said (really, not sarcastically) and then she immediately changed her position.


My old boss would tell people that I was her right hand, and I was moving up the corporate ladder, but this boss makes me feel like I can't do anything right.  This sucks. I feel so angry and anxious, and I Want to cry daily.


yes, I know.... Get a new job. Part of me would love to, and I have been looking. Unemployment is super low here. I am all alone, and need to be able to pay the mortgage. Another part of me is scared to death to start over.... And finally my boss is at least 105 so how much longer can she last? I shouldn't let her run me out. 


thanks for letting me vent.

Katydid
Katydid
Thank you :-) one thing I didn't mention, my boss is the head of our human resources office.
Calebb
Calebb
Her days are numbered. What U say tells me she will cause herself trouble -- eventually.

But maybe we are not to hold our breath. So.. Can you hint to others in the department, and develop a coalition
... of resistance?

good luck; I do wish you good luck
Community LeaderMid
Mid
First, take a moment to breathe. Stay hydrated. In cases such as this, where your skills, abilities, and knowledge worked great with previous boss, the new boss comes in with a huge chip on their shoulder. It shows. Rather than feed it, do what you do best, with a smile, kind words, and practice being calm in front of the mirror so you can remain calm during all of her tirades. Keep your journal private, and since she is HR (human resources), know your boundaries inside and out. Do not ever engage her "right or wrong", it's her problem. She can switch her views so quickly, stay out of it entirely. Change your response to help your well-being. You're working closely with her, so keep your distance, in voice, in action, in response. In other words, keep the work focused on fact, statement, written, and simple. You're not paid to be nice, you're paid to work. Wishing you the best with this.
Katydid
Katydid
Hi Calebb thank you. I do have a coworker that experiences some of the same treatment, but not to the same extent. It does help to know that it isn't just me.

Thank-you mideyebrow, I do need to breathe and drink more water :) as of Tuesday this week, I kind of made my mind up that I was going to try some of the things that you recommended... the smiling, kind words, changing my reactions, etc. The first-day it was great, but she certainly can push my buttons, so I need some patience, and some practice. I will keep trying, :)

Hi bad luck... yes, I do work in the corporate office.... and you are all right about keeping the journal.

Thanks again. You all are amazing.
Hem
Hem
I feel your pain. I have a similar situation at my job, but with a younger man being my boss. Since being in this new position I have had days when I wanted to do something that would just get me lock up. There is always something wrong with what I do, I finally stop allowing him to waste my precious tears. One day I just said not now and walked away. I actually went to the ladies room, but removing myself gave me time to breathe. When I returned he did not return to my office. I know he will be back to bother me, but I also know I don't have to listen to someone that seems to get kicks from picking on people under them. If you can try to quiet your mine and don't let her end. Interrupt her just by saying hold that thought I will be right back. The powerless always show their puesdo strenght by preying on those who react to them. Be strong and pray forget strenght.
Hem
Hem
I meant mind sorry for typo
Katydid
Katydid
Thank you Hem. I will have to take that breather break, thanks for the suggestion, I appreciate it..
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