Yup, I've taken more spins on this not-so-merry-go-round than I care to count, if it is even possible to count. For sure, I don't have enough fingers and toes for the tally.

Is it progress that I no longer feel defeated when the cycle repeats? Acceptance helps me be more at ease with the cycles of life. Mindfulness helps me know when and where to apply therapy tools. My therapy support network helps me feel less freaky for ^it^ all.

But that is me. . .

Gentle support while you figure your own cycle, Jroj. I am glad you were able to put *almost* in front of *defeated.* You are not alone, Jroj. May none of us ever be defeated.

Thank you for your kind words. That's probably why I feel back off . I used to go to therapy and was doing great. Then unfortunately I moved and went with out and now dealing with it again. I will now search for a new therapist and start again. I guess I was blind sided by it coming back.

I'll bet you dollars to wishes you have allot more clues this time than the last time. You aren't starting from scratch. If you pulled it off once, you have a chance of doing it better this time.

I have come to think of my daily therapy exercises as, "Spiritual Maintenance." It doesn't take much out of my day and helps me keep a stable course. Still, I am in a similar position of being removed from my live support network with loads of pressure coming at me from every angle. Sometimes a body needs a flesh and blood shoulder to lean on. Stepping small, praying big and doubling up on the therapy exercises.

As this is the first year marker, I will add that it signifies a chapter that has changed quite a bit of your life.

Having gone through this, and remembering the tools I learned to use to help me reset my balance naturally took a bit. Anxiety is natural, so when I notice the change or the absence of the anxiety (this was unexpected and really pulled the rug out from under my feet), I put the writing back in front and it helps,

You've taken the important first step in helping heal with writing it out. Best wishes. You are not alone.

Thank you arfie. You are right i will be alittle more cofiendent in dealing with . I am actually considering meds in the mean time . And mid you make valid points I'm regards to anxiety being natural to a certain extent . I guess we have to learn how to manage it

I'm sorry you are feeling some anxiety again. Looking for a new therapist sounds like a good idea. I hope you can find some coping methods that work for you.

Thank you guys . This helps knowing there people out there that support each other especially with anxiety . It's hard to talk to people who don't understand anxiety

Could it be just a bad turn? You said you were doing great for over a year. Did something happen in your life?
Your wording made me think like an alcoholic who fell off the wagon. I mean the greatest respect and just wonder if it could possibly just be a new situation in your life. The wording just sounded like you feel 'once depressed... Always depressed'. But I do commend you for seeking help and advice, that's a good positive trait.

@kingsolomon66. I didnt fall off the wagon. I think it's just alot of stress and alot on my plate. But depressed I dont think so more like tired of anxiety . It would drain my energy

It is a great idea to try new therapies until you are not getting completely fine.