Hi, I am new to this support group, I just had a discussion with my husband about wanting to drink really bad. I am a recovering alcoholic, sober for 26 years. And my hypochondria is really making me angry right now. 

I go through bouts now and then, and right now I am in the midst of a health anxiety attack..I started out having a feeling of a lump in my throat 2 weeks ago. started with head cold, ear ache for a day and runny nose---then out of the blue I start noticing this lump when i swallowed. not all the time, it would come and go. Then a few days later i had alot of heartburn. I was diagnosed with a small hiatal hernia 3 years ago during an endoscopy. no symptoms so I thought maybe that was just acting up and went to see my gastro dr. He scared the hell out of me because he said its probably a spasm--no big deal---BUT then he said i should have endoscope done to rule out cancer---so i panicked. He also said it could be lung cancer. I am 51 years old, and i smoke. But I didnt have any other symptoms.

I went to get a barrium swallow since i dont have insurance right now--and an endoscopy would cost more---but the barrium xray was normal--so i started to relax..still had the lump but was feeling kind of better--the barrium was causing a little constipation and my throat felt dry and still heartburn--then this morning when i coughed I saw a little bit of blood--i think--it was bright red but just a little bit..none since--my first thought was i am going to die of lung cancer---worse yet I am going to suffer a long painful death--I couldnt stop worrying about it.My daughter was mad at me for worrying..Its saturday so unless I go to ER I cant really see a dr. I keep telling myself it was only a little bit and it may not have even been blood. I am a nervous wreck..I was coughing on and off for 2 weeks..nothing major..still kindof have a stuffy nose. My dr put me on antibiotic..ends in a few days..

I am so upset, so nervous..I wanted to drink or take something to relax..I hate my anxiety---Any support would be so greatly appreciated...please respond..I need help!!!