Anxiety Support Group
Anxiety is a physical condition marked by intense and persistent feelings of distress, fear, angst or dread. General anxiety caused by routine day-to-day stresses usually passes quickly and is experienced by almost everyone at one time or another. However, such feelings that linger over time and are very difficult to cope with, and which lack a clear cause, may indicate...
Enough is Enough. A few years ago, I was on disability and spent a lot of time caring for my Aunt. One particular Tuesday, I remember standing at my kitchen sink and being excited because I had the day to myself. I was so happy, until my Aunt called, frantic that she dropped and broke her blood pressure monitor and needed a new one. I was so wigged out! I didn't leave my house and frankly, had reached a point where I didn't care if she died. My head felt like it was going to explode. I was pushed too far. I have had friends who drove me to the same point. I definitely got stuck on thoughts about them. I am not sure if it was some kind of threat or simply that I couldn't understand them.
Why would you pine away over people you can't have? For 30 years? Why would you prefer driving in the rain? Why would you brag incessantly? Why would you turn everything that I say about me to something about you, in excess? I guess the fact that I don't like talking bad about people that it just festered in my mind. I think I told you that I recently decided not to call a friend back. It was hovering over my head for 3 months when I decided that enough was enough. I'm tired of defending my position that I don't like talking on the phone (about problems). I feel like I am about to cross the finish line to a better life. I have been talking a lot to my friend Lisa and she is like a breath of fresh air. We have worked out twice together and will do it more often in the future. She is so positive. She's into health like me. She doesn't monopolize conversations. She's kind and non-judgemental. She's one of the best mothers that I've known. So yeah, I don't know why some people have been in my life, just to bother the hell out of me. I take my part in staying too long. As to my now ex-best friend, I don't need her immature, jealous, alcoholic, cheating, nasty self around me anymore. I passed her on the ramp at school on Thursday and just kept going and didn't feel a tiny bit bad. I always looked out for her. I did a lot of favors for her. She had a nerve telling me not to ask for any favors and "your loss". I can't be around people who can't learn lessons in life. She was jealous and mean when I was losing weight but I had to hear every detail of her journey. That's fair? No, that's hurtful.
Do you have any stuck thoughts?
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I'm finally home having been gone since 11 AM. I'm burning up with a fever. My older sister and her man let me drive home with them because so was over the day. So I let my dogs out and I fed them a VERY late dinner. I'm waiting on my parents t get home before I take my meds and go to bed. It was a pretty decent weekend all in all. Mom behaved herself which was my main worry. I'm ok...
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I am new to this group. My husband shocked me and filed for divorce after 24 years. I'm lonely and in pain. There is an affair as well which is extremely painful. I feel like I'm not going to make it through this.
sigh. . .
pete seeger/bob dylan are floating from the juke box in my head. thank you for sliding the nickel in the jukebox.
"when will we ever learn
"when will we e-e-e-e-eve-e-er learn?"
for what it's worth
my heavily theraputed response to, "plastic people" is that when i can no longer tolerate a person's presence in my life, i pray for healing as we separate. "healing hopes for all. no exceptions."
Like Arfie wrote, the modern social media thing is just dump the toxic people in your life. Who gets to label me or you like this? It used to be that we tolerated some people all the while knowing they are difficult. I have been dumped myself as the toxic person.
And yet, like you I have met a few really nice, kind, people who are a delight to be with. I don't have to try to change them because they are fine like they are. I think in our old immaturity we somehow needed those so called toxic folks for one reason or another. Maybe we didn't value ourselves enough to look for the good, kind, listening and sharing, types of folks.
And people do change over time. Their lives are maybe more unhappy than we ever knew because they hid it. Maybe their own unhappiness or feeling less than, insecure, makes them critical of the world and of us.
We can love difficult people and put up with them to a certain extent. We can do this without allowing anyone to be abusive to us, cruel to us, etc. But we don't have to allow someone to treat us so badly and it sounds like that former BF is very immature. Maybe you didn't see it earlier because she was at a happier time of life or maybe you didn't want to see it. I have been in your shoes and when I woke up to reality, I was kind of stunned at my own stinking thinking.
Hugs to you as you dig deeper and work to find kind, nice, folks. I walk the same path as you as I look for nice, kind, folks who want to be friends.